Is Healing Your Body a Full-time Job? Tips for Easing the Overwhelm

Does this sound like a typical week? A doctor’s appointment, a massage, acupuncture, daily yoga, therapy, 25 daily supplements, morning green juice, daily meditation, cardio, cooking, and that’s after cleaning the house, getting the kids to school and finishing the sales presentation. Wow, I’m tired just thinking about it.

Healing your body from illness can seem like a full-time job on top of your regular life ? a job you didn’t even apply for.

How do you manage it all without going crazy or making yourself sicker? One option is to ignore your self-care and go on with life as usual. I’ve seen this work for some, but usually not for the long term.

Alternatively, you can try to do it all at once and get overwhelmed under the weight of juggling all your healing tasks with your family and career obligations. Early on, when I was healing myself from multiple sclerosis, I spent more nights at the dinner table crying from overwhelm than I like to think about.

I eventually found a third way between overwhelm and denying the disease. I found a way that honors the healing process without having it consume or define your life. Here are some those lessons.

Start slow.

It can be natural for some of us to take on all the healing modalities at once. That was biggest the mistake I made. I was so determined to stay out of a wheelchair that I jumped in with both feet. I don’t advise it. It’s not possible and it’s not wise.

Instead, start with a few items and build up your self-care muscle. Start with green juicing or 20 minutes of meditation every other day. Any one of these can give you more energy so you can later add yoga or massage.

Self-care is a project.

While you might not have asked for this job, it is yours. Put it on your to-do list. Not just the appointments, but also the juicing, the baths, the supplements – everything.

But don’t put it at the bottom where you will forget it. That’s easy to do without a deadline. Instead, place healing at the top of your list.

I know this sounds like it will create more stress. But it works to shift your paradigm, and put self-love front and center. If you are notorious for taking care of yourself last, illness marks the end of that.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying sales reports and soccer practice aren’t important. Yet if you are sick or too fatigued, you won’t make those anyway. There is a reason they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first.

Plan, delegate and execute

OK, all your healing tasks are on your to-do list. Great. But that doesn’t by itself make it any less overwhelming. Just like that big project at work, break down the tasks, plan them out, efficiently multitask and engage help when needed.

Here’s an example. You want to make green juice each morning, but you also need to get the kids and yourself out the door. Plan it out. Sunday afternoon clean, cut and prepare all the produce for the week. Then put enough for a day in seven separate bags. You can even have the kids help. Each morning, grab a bag, juice it and head out the door.

Make healing fun.

Ask a person who loves their job what they love about it and they will almost always say, “because it’s fun.” Why not make self-care fun?

Spice things up. Try Thai massage. Practice yoga naked. Dance in your skivvies to Lady Gaga instead of going to the gym. Play soccer with your kid, and score parenting and self-care points. Be creative.

Make healing sacred.

OK, the shot I give myself every day is not fun. Having to down all those supplements three times a day is no joy either. How do you get through the yucky stuff?

Make those moments sacred. Take a deep breath. Burn a candle or put on a relaxing sacred CD. (I love Tibetan singing bowls.) Then as you pop that pill or insert that needle, imagine it is a magic potion going directly to the source of your illness and restoring your health. Not only does this take the dread out of these tasks, you also incorporate the power of guided imagery that may even boost the healing effects of your medicine.

Be kind to yourself.

I imagine self-care like a serving tray overflowing with beautiful dishes. There are so many dishes piled up that occasionally one falls off. No worries, I just place it back on the tray and continue on. The same is true of all your healing methods.

Know that on any given week or day, something will fall off. You will forget your midday supplements. You will be too tired for yoga. It’s OK. Don’t beat yourself up. Expect it to happen. Why? Because you are human.

What do you do when it happens? Get back on the bike. Pick up the task the next day.

But one word of caution: Create boundaries around the ultra-important healing tasks. Those are the ones that will set your healing back big time if it falls off the tray. For example, I never miss my daily injection, no matter what. For you it may be a pill. Or yoga. Regardless, create strict boundaries around those one or two things. And then don’t cry over the other stuff.

How will you organize your week so you have the time to make self-care an integral and non-overwhelming part of your life?

Laurie Erdman is a holistic health coach and the Chief Wellness Hero at Chronic Wellness Coaching. She helps her clients take the overwhelm and confusion out of their healing journeys.

Photo credit: Tyler Axtell

Reclaim Your Mornings

Start the day on your own terms, and change your life for the better.

Every day, millions wake with a sense of urgency. Jerked from sleep by an alarm, we lurch directly to the coffeemaker, to our email, to the day’s news headlines, or some other up-and-at-’em directive.

One way or another, we abruptly press the day’s “on” switch, and before we’re entirely conscious, long before our brains and bodies have nudged themselves into first gear, we’ve thrown them into overdrive.

As a result, we may wind up feeling frenzied, reactive — and taking that energy into the rest of our day, infusing it into all our interactions and projects.

We also miss out on a lot of insights and creative impulses available to us during the brief “twilight state” of theta brainwave activity that exists almost exclusively between sleep and waking awareness. What a waste!

So, I’m making a case for reclaiming our mornings — or even some small part of our mornings — as an act of defiance against the less-than-satisfying status quo, and as a delightful and potentially transformative act of self-care.

My sister, Andrea, has this down to a sacred science. She gets up before anyone else in her house, lights a candle and a stick of incense, then puts on relaxing music. She unrolls her yoga mat, sits, and — at minimum — takes three long, centering breaths.

Generally, those three deep breaths lead her into a gentle yoga practice that may last anywhere from five to 30 minutes. At the end of her practice, she meditates for a few moments, sending loving thoughts to her friends and family, and setting some key intentions for the day.

When her mat-based practice is complete, she makes tea, has breakfast, and only then does she turn on her phone, consult her calendar and begin the active portion of her day.

Understand, this is not some idealized nice-when-it-happens thing for my sister. It’s a rock solid deal. She’s missed maybe half a dozen days in the past several years. That’s because she has a very simple, default-minimum commitment: Unroll the mat, sit, take three breaths. That’s it. The rest is negotiable.

Sometimes, things come up, of course, and when a longer practice isn’t possible, Andrea adjusts the program accordingly. But she never gives up on unrolling her mat, centering and taking those three deep breaths.

If she can get that far, she says, she almost always finds the time and willingness to do a little more. And she says these few high-value moments she devotes entirely to herself help establish a conscious tone and rhythm that carries through her entire day — and by extension, her life in general.

Then there’s my friend Brian Johnson, founder of PhilosophersNotes (insightful six-page summaries of books on optimal living, the reading of which make for a great morning practice in and of themselves). Brian starts his day with a whole series of what he calls “blissiplines” – daily disciplines he’s found to be fundamental in creating the conditions for his best, most blissful life.

Brian’s blissiplines include about a half an hour of meditation and movement, followed by time spent journaling and reading. Like my sister, Brian says he’s found these practices so essential for optimizing his productivity, creativity and happiness that he can no longer imagine going without them.

Of course, it does take a certain amount of willingness and discipline to establish a morning ritual, particularly if your current a.m. routine is so dull and drudging that you’ve never paused to consider it.

Happily, you don’t have to devote hours to a morning ritual in order to benefit. You just have to have a ritual and do it consistently — ideally, even (and perhaps especially) when you don’t feel like it.

I suggest keeping your ritual short, easy and very doable to start with, knowing that you can always expand it if and when you like.

When I first started doing my own morning practice (about eight years ago) it simply consisted of having a cup of coffee out on the porch, listening to the birds chirp, and pulling a wisdom card to help me start the day on a calm, conscious note. Total time: five minutes, max.

I’ve had more leisurely rituals, too. They’ve involved everything from candlelight journaling and guided visualizations to guitar playing.

Every year or so, I like to tinker with my ritual, working in various meditations and creative practices, gentle exercise, music, time outdoors, wisdom literature, poetry, or whatever appeals to me at the time.

Lately, I’ve gotten into following my sister’s example and doing morning yoga. My current minimum commitment is five minutes, but like her, I often wind up doing a bit more.

Maybe it’s the track of the Tibetan meditation music I play during my practice (it runs for about seven minutes, and it’s so mesmerizing, I can’t bear to pull away from my reverie before it ends). Or maybe it’s just that I really dig the mellow vibe I’ve created for myself by choosing to be before I do.

Whatever the case, I’ve come to love this Revolutionary Act (Read all of them here: “101 Revolutionary Ways to Be Healthy”), and I highly recommend it to anyone hungry for a little more centering and a little less stress in his or her life.

You can learn more about why the very first (and last) moments of our days count for so much, and get ideas for how to develop calming rituals in your own life by reading these articles: “Bookends,” “The Things We Remember, “ and “The Morning Rush.”

Meanwhile, is there a small step you can take toward reclaiming your own mornings, starting now?

Do you already have a favorite morning practice of your own? If so, please share your ideas in the comments section below.

The more of us who choose to start our days on our own terms, the less frenzied this world of ours will feel. And the more opportunity we’ll all have to make the best and most conscious use of the waking hours at our disposal.

For more information on how to optimize your life, visit ExperienceLife.com.

6 Steps Towards Emotional Wellness

by Jennifer Reger

I’ve spent the past five years on the quest for wellness, with much of my time, efforts and money devoted to better food choices. I bought organic, read label after label, avoided processed food, and experimented with various food plans before choosing a vegan, plant-based diet. With all my energy focused on food, and more recently a regular fitness routine, I managed to overlook a crucial component of health: emotional wellness. And with everything else going on in my life, you’d think I would have worked on this sooner.

I felt a lack of direction in my career. My job was paying the bills, and I was grateful for that. But I knew I needed a creative outlet, and my passions were going unfulfilled. I hadn’t been able to find a relationship that stuck, which in hindsight was a blessing, but nonetheless painful. Bottom line: I had mistakenly relied on social identities and external factors (things and people) for happiness, which left me feeling less than stellar. So while emotional wellness should have been at the forefront of my health venture, food was my main priority and a distraction that I could control in terms of outcomes. I soon realized I needed to cultivate a daily practice focusing on emotional health that I could do as I dealt with my work and relationship situations.

Here are some of the steps I’ve recently taken in creating emotional wealth:

Take an internal inventory: Identify emotional triggers. I began my journey by acknowledging things in my life that drained me and that fueled me. Cheryl Richardson’s book, “Take Time for Your Life,” is a great resource and starting point; she provides a list that covers all grounds to explore: job satisfaction, relationships, spirituality, physical health and dwelling place. While a person is so much more than any of these parts, it’s important to recognize how we connect our emotional well-being to the quality of our experience with these aspects of our lives.

Practice self-care religiously. Nutrition, movement, quiet time (be it meditation, yoga or spiritual reflection), sleep and positive self-talk are essential. While they are components to general well-being, I’d argue they are integral to emotional wellness too. Ever experience anxiety or unexplained feelings of sadness after eating a super sugary cookie? Feel irritable after only five hours of sleep? How do you feel after a jog or green juice? Nurturing the physical, spiritual and mental aspects of your life will have you feeling pretty darn good and balanced.

When the going gets tough, give yourself some extra lovin’. Regardless of how well you might be feeling in general, bumps in the road are inevitable. It’s nice to have some “go-to” goodies when we need a little pick me up. This might include a feel-good movie (heck, it might be a tear-jerker to release pent-up emotion!), a favorite CD, a friend to lean on or hug or a cup of tea. And don’t forget to include some affirmations. They are powerful in creating a positive outlook on any situation. Love and light will come from you and to you. It’s amazing how saying (and believing), “Today is going to be a good one,” never ceases to result in a kick-ass day.

Mind the gap. I realized that I was spending way too much time inside my head, worrying about the future and regretting some things that had happened in the past (over which I had no control). I was both the prisoner and the warden in the cell of my mind. Yikes! If you find yourself fixated on anything besides the here and now or engaging in negative self-talk, check out Eckhart Tolle’s book, “The Power of Now.” His exercise of “watching the thinker” is revealing and freeing. After practicing detachment from both the mind and the ego, I was brimming with happiness and ease. Emotional wellness is indeed dependent on the state of one’s mind.

Nurture and expand your perspective; exercise connectivity. It’s so easy to get lost in our own worlds, the direction we are going or wish to go, and what means of fulfillment we are seeking. When done excessively, we can lose sight of the bigger picture or miss out on something great. A gratitude journal helps me recognize all the kind and generous things people have done for me that day and that I’ve witnessed being done for others. I have started to give a wink and a nod to challenges too – those perceived roadblocks, which are often the greatest teachers.

And if you’re feeling particularly low or isolated and the gratitude journal just ain’t doing the trick, there’s an awesome exercise in connectivity that you can do anytime, anywhere. Notice how everything you have experienced in a day – the bus you rode, a building you work in, the salad you grabbed from the deli, the shoes you’re wearing, the paper or book you’re reading – were all created and touched by others. Even if someone didn’t do something noticeably nice for you that day, there were many hands involved in the way you got to work, the food you ate, the book in your hands, what you wore. I always feel nurtured after this exercise.

Receive. I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but it’s worth repeating. Giving to others is great, but if you give and give and give there will be nothing left for you. And it sends the wrong message to the universe, too. Emotional wellness calls for balance and by giving too much without receiving, we deplete our energy sources. I’ve noticed recently that I regularly decline people’s help and attention, not wanting to be a burden. When someone asks how I am, I often deflect the attention by saying, “I’m fine. How are you? What’s going on with you?” I realized that such actions will keep things from coming into my life. It’s only in being open to receiving and being interdependent that we get the things we need. I’m still working on this one. Are you?

None of these practices is rocket science; they are quite simple. And chances are that the wellness warriors of the Crazy Sexy Life community are doing some of these very exercises. But in our fast-paced, information-overload world, it’s so easy to get off track. And it’s nice to get a reminder now and again to slow down and take a breath.

Jennifer Reger is creator of the wellness blog Holistic Health Junkie. She lives in Philadelphia.

Photo credit: Mr. Anathema

Love List: Luscious Skin Care

Hi Radiant Queen,

From time to time I love to update my favorite organic beauty products. A few months ago I got the best gift ever! Annmarie Gianni sent me a slew of her healthy potions and lotions from her new skincare line. Ya know why I say it was “the best gift ever”?

One: Because her products blew my mind (not easy to do). Annmarie literally harnesses the power of Mother Nature in a bottle. Vazoom!

Two: Because her gift was unconditional. She didn’t ask me to do anything but “enjoy.” Annmarie and her husband, the fabulous Kevin Gianni, noticed how hard I was working promoting Crazy Sexy Diet. They were so proud of all I was doing to uplift the lives of others that they wanted me to enjoy a bit of pampering, no strings attached. Um, really? I was so touched!

Note: Lots of folks send me products for review. When I launched my periodic Love Lists, my mailbox exploded. As you all know, I only write about things I adore and use myself. Translation: You can’t buy move LOVE. When I tried Annmarie’s gems I immediately thought, holy shitake! I have to spread the word because this shit totally rocks! As a matter of fact, I love these products so much that I joined her affiliate program.

Sisters, if you’re looking for something new, give this chemical-free skincare line a whirl here. They’re an all-natural, organic blend between shaman magic, Medicine Woman wisdom and a potent herbalist cocktail, (Hey Bartender! I’ll definitely have another). As Annmarie says, “the line brings the ancient healing energies and awareness directly to you so that you may radiate your own natural beauty.”

Here are my favorites. I’ve been using them daily for about a month and my skin is less dry and more glowy. Also, my makeup doesn’t cake or get caught in my near-40 creases as much as it did when I was using other cleansers and moisturizers.

I love the Aloe-Herb Cleanser. It leaves my skin fresh, clean and hydrated. Plus it smells like heaven in the springtime.

I love the Neroli Toning Mist, which I apply after cleansing and before moisturizer. It smells like angels blowing air kisses.

I love the Herbal Facial Oil. After washing and misting my face, I apply 1-2 pumps of this oil. At first I thought it would make me breakout or look like a grease slick. Oh no, Mon Ami. My skin drinks it in like a nourishing oasis filled with antioxidant bliss. This oil may just be the fountain of youth!

I love the Anti-Aging Eye Cream. Who knows if it will keep the facial crows in check? I like to think it just might. It’s cooling, calming and totally rejuvenating. Filled with cucumbers, green tea, echinacea and something else I can’t pronounce.

I love the purifying mud mask. It tightens and tones my skin. It also makes me look like a warrior princess and it’s a terrific way to frighten the UPS guy.

I love love love the coconut body oil. My legs and the back of my arms love it too. So do my cracky elbows and heels.

I’ve also tried Ayurvedic facial scrub. It’s a like, not a love. I smelled like Indian food and got more up my nose than on my face. I probably need to give it another shot.

Annmarie has lots of other groovy products to play with. Browse away, love lady! (My gift to you: 10% off any product. Use coupon code: sexy.)

Crazy Sexy Personal Beauty Tips

1. Drink ½ your body weight in ounces of purified water daily. If you’re a daily green juice Goddess, you can drink less.
2. Eat a varied plant-based diet high in raw organic foods, green juices and green smoothies.
3. Dump animal products, fake foods, sodas, coffee and energy drinks.
4. Sweat your prayers and shake your ass-ets. Move your God Pod 3-5 times per week.
5. Rest. Sleep is something we never catch-up on. Try to get 8 hours of uninterrupted slumber between the hours of 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.
6. Dry brush. Your skin is your largest organ. Keep it bright and unobstructed with daily dry brushing.
7. Positive re-programming. A healthy and glowy body isn’t just about what you eat and what you put on your skin, it’s also about addressing what’s eating you. Face what’s holding you back in an honest and authentic way. Move through your darkness into your brilliant light (so bright we need expensive sunglasses). Practice EFT, journaling, check-ups from the neck ups, meditation, and visualization and smile therapy. Look in the mirror each day and say, “You are gorgeous inside and out, upside and down.”
8. Spend time in Mother Nature and align your inner rhythm to hers. There’s a time and a season for growth, renewal, refuge and silence. In our fast-paced world we often go against our inner grain. Stop, drop and remember.
9. Go to church. And by church, I mean nature. Spend time outside in the sunshine, breathe deep, hug a tree, do sun salutes in the rain, sit and meditate like the Buddha, get dirt under your nails by planting a garden and feed the birds. Enlightenment will come.

Peace and pretty,
KC

PS – For 10% off, remember to use your coupon code “sexy” here. Hurry, expires April 6!

Six Ways to Ease Your Postpartum Frazzle

Postpartum self-care is an important topic that doesn’t get enough attention. When I was pregnant, nobody really talked about it other than saying, “Make sure you have food in the freezer because you’ll be too tired to cook.” But you know what? There’s more to it.

As my midwife said with a chuckle, “Try getting a one-month postpartum mom to feel sorry for a woman in labor … not gonna happen.” I now understand the sentiment. No doubt there are plenty of women who have wonderful postpartum experiences. In general, however, it can be rough. It’s important to make sure you take care of yourself. Not just for you, but for your baby. Remember, happy mommy equals happy baby (at least for the most part – haha).

Postpartum emotions sweep from one end of the spectrum to the other. Naturally this special time is primarily filled with joy. But it can also be a time of anxiety and stress, particularly for first-time moms. My hormone-soaked emotions took a roller coaster ride shortly after my baby’s birth. Most of the time I was up high as a kite, happy as can be (heck, I had a baby – I was so happy!). But there were also times I was stressed, worrying about all kinds of what-ifs and decisions that would affect my baby. Anxious thoughts crept in from all sides: Why hasn’t her cord stump fallen off yet? Is she eating enough? Why is my boob lumpy? Is she sleeping enough? I hope she doesn’t get sick. Is she getting enough indirect sunlight for her jaundice? For that matter, what the hell is “indirect sunlight” – shade?

And a whole slew of other things.

But perhaps the hardest part was the lack of sleep. I’m breastfeeding on demand, which means living on a 24-hour clock, being sleep-deprived and constantly exhausted (especially the early months – my baby fed every one-two hours it seemed). Extreme fatigue makes everything worse. Normal, trivial problems can become almost unmanageable. Fatigue makes hormone swings feel more intense and shortens your fuse, meaning it takes less to set you off and the bang is louder. But as all new moms do, I made it through, and I’m on the other side. Things are definitely nicer now, allowing me to enjoy motherhood and its magical moments that come every day.

Postpartum Self-Care Tips

So what’s the best way to care for yourself? Here are a few things that helped me.

1. Eat well. Nutrition is important. I didn’t always have time to make food, and my husband was best used for making fruit and veggie runs to the store. The solution: giant smoothies packed with tons of goodies made for super easy and healthy meals. I loaded them with organic fruits, greens, probiotics, nuts or seeds, coconut oil, superfoods, chia or flax seeds, etc. It’s important to keep calories up because you’re burning extra by breastfeeding. I could easily chug down 600 calories in one of my smoothies. It was delicious raw vegan goodness. I also kept fresh fruit, trail mix and other organic snacks on hand at all times.

I also enjoyed Joyful Mother Tea, a blend of teas that support a happy mama and her changing hormones. Better yet, drink a nice cup of tea while you take a bath. Even if it’s only 30 minutes to pamper yourself and relax, do it. The 30 minutes you take for yourself recharges you the remaining 23.5 hours that you need to care for baby.

2. Make a list. Create a list of “must haves” and make sure you have them. These are things that make your life easier. For me it was having a breastfeeding stool to prop my feet on, plenty of organic cloth prefolds lying around ready to wipe baby spit-up, water to drink at various places I nurse, my Kindle with books to read while nursing, a baby rocker/swing chair that can move from room to room where I can place baby while I’m eating, making a smoothie or going to the bathroom. I also had a friend I could go to for support and questions. As a first-time mama, I had tons of questions. Having access to a friend that I could text or e-mail anytime was a life saver. Figure out your must haves and make sure you have them.

3. Relaxing music. Lullabies are a wonderful way to self-care a postpartum mama. I know lullabies are traditionally for the baby, but as a mom, I can’t tell you how nice and relaxing it was to have them playing.

4. Ask for help. Self-care is about taking care of yourself, whether you do it or someone else helps. So please ask for help! Ask for anything and everything. Don’t be afraid to call on your partner, family and friends so that you can focus on baby. Put family and friends to work! Trust me, they want to help.

5. Cry. As much as you want or need. Just let it out. The hormones will probably make you want to wail at least once. Do it. It’s cathartic. Having a baby is life changing. Some of us need to cry at least once during that transition. It’s OK!

6. Baby steps. Your new baby isn’t the only one learning a bunch of new things – you are too. Don’t bite off more than you can chew. Overloading yourself is a recipe for frustration. Learn things one at a time. I concentrated on breastfeeding for several weeks until I had it down just right. Then I worked on babywearing until I was completely comfortable with it. Then I started playing around with cloth diapers. But to learn all of those things at once would have been too much for me, especially as a first-time mom.

By focusing on yourself with just a few of these items, you’ll be in a much better frame of mind. You and your baby will appreciate the difference!