I have had a good year. The fact of it keeps surprising me because I am so used to problems. And recently I have been experiencing longer and longer stretches without problems. Life just seems to be unfolding without them. In their place have been a lot of things to appreciate. Not only have things felt really fun and worthwhile, I have also not had the sense that sometime soon the other shoe will drop and life will get all crappy again.

This “fun goodness” is so noticeably different from much of my experience that it has forced me to consider its cause. As far as I can tell, there are two basic reasons my problems have been replaced with worthwhile opportunities.

I have stopped thinking in terms of problems. I wake up, there is stuff that I have to do, and that is pretty much that. It happens every day and shows no sign of stopping until my last breath. My mantra for the stuff that comes up each day is [...]]]>

I have had a good year. The fact of it keeps surprising me because I am so used to problems. And recently I have been experiencing longer and longer stretches without problems. Life just seems to be unfolding without them. In their place have been a lot of things to appreciate. Not only have things felt really fun and worthwhile, I have also not had the sense that sometime soon the other shoe will drop and life will get all crappy again.

This “fun goodness” is so noticeably different from much of my experience that it has forced me to consider its cause. As far as I can tell, there are two basic reasons my problems have been replaced with worthwhile opportunities.

I have stopped thinking in terms of problems. I wake up, there is stuff that I have to do, and that is pretty much that. It happens every day and shows no sign of stopping until my last breath. My mantra for the stuff that comes up each day is “What else did you have planned?” The long version would be “I thought you were here to have a human life. You know, one where you have stuff to do for 70 to 80 years, then you are done doing stuff. What else did you have planned?” When did having a life become a problem?

Since becoming a parent and a dedicated meditator, I have developed the habit of considering my motivations before taking an action. The most important questions seem to be ”Am I about to take an action based on faith?” and “Am I about to take an action based on love?” If I am, the action seems to contribute to “fun goodness.” If not, the action seems to create problems. It really matters why I am doing what I am doing in terms of how the results affect my life.

My teachers suggest that we not make a burden of our duties. Who needs problems, anyway? They just create a negative charge around something we have to do and might learn from and profit from, if we don’t expend all our energy making life a problem. The energy we don’t waste having problems can be poured into actions taken from a place of faith and love, and life can start feeling sacred and sweet.

For more information on how to optimize your health, visit RolfGates.com.

Photo credit: Alex Bartok

“What you are is what you have been. What you’ll be is what you do now.” – Buddha

Even though life is sometimes messy and unpredictable, there is one constant — opportunities will come and go. And the reality is that opportunities are abundant when we are open to them. When we are open to new things and eager to branch out of our safe, cozy, comfort zone, we can open up a world of new possibilities. And it all starts with one easy step: Play the game, and get on the court. Landmark Forum’s self-improvement course teaches the power of getting on the court in life vs. sitting in the stands.

Think about a sporting event. Spectators cheer from the stands but never put themselves at risk. They are not the ones taking any risks or making anything happen. Rather, they sit, watch, judge and wait, while the players are full of life. They are the doers, making life happen and work with them. [...]]]>

“What you are is what you have been. What you’ll be is what you do now.” – Buddha

Even though life is sometimes messy and unpredictable, there is one constant — opportunities will come and go. And the reality is that opportunities are abundant when we are open to them. When we are open to new things and eager to branch out of our safe, cozy, comfort zone, we can open up a world of new possibilities. And it all starts with one easy step: Play the game, and get on the court. Landmark Forum’s self-improvement course teaches the power of getting on the court in life vs. sitting in the stands.

Think about a sporting event. Spectators cheer from the stands but never put themselves at risk. They are not the ones taking any risks or making anything happen. Rather, they sit, watch, judge and wait, while the players are full of life. They are the doers, making life happen and work with them. They see an opportunity and go for it. They take risks and play hard. Of the two types of people, which would you rather be?

More often than not, I have been a spectator in my own life. I let life happen to me and fell into deep, moldy holes. The only way to pull me out of each depression episode was to take responsibility for my own life and start making calls – getting my butt up out of “self-pity-ville” and taking action to guide me in a better direction. It started with one single step forward, by getting onto the court of my own life.

If you look at your life as a bestselling book or blockbuster movie, how is yours playing out? What kind of picture are you in? Is it full of depression, mistakes, regrets and secrets? Or are you the hero in your own starring role? Are you in a role that challenges and excites you? Do you seize the day and make the moment matter? The opportunity here is to dream of possibilities and things beyond the traditional confines of cultural and social acceptability. Whenever there are areas of our lives we are unhappy with, often, the human tendency is to ignore them … to simply act as if they are not an issue; out of sight, out of mind.

For example, maybe you are unhappy with your job. I was the queen of bitter job certainty. I lived the “this is how things are” card to its death, meaning I was a victim of the negative perpetrations of my job. I worked with people who didn’t understand me or respect my contributions. They always made me feel like an outsider, and I always had a boss who seemed to have ulterior motives. I could never trust them. No matter where I went, what city, this job was where I was. I’d quit one company and start working at a completely different company, sometimes even different industries and would always find myself crying in the bathroom on lunch break.

I would tell myself it is normal to cry at work and this is just how life is supposed to be. I would come home and complain to whoever would listen about how bad my job was, how lame the people I worked with were and how I wasn’t getting what I deserved. That’s a lot of “me, me, and me” talk if you ask me. I was pretty self-consumed and exhausting the victim role. I kept playing out my same reality over and over until one day I was talking to a friend. I was complaining about my new boss and the work I was doing, when she gently said, “Sounds like your last two jobs.”

I realized then and there that the only thing all these nasty, toxic environments had in common was me. I was the connecting thread to all of these mishaps in the workplace. I took mental stock and realized I am accountable for everything in my life. All of these patterns that kept surfacing were a common thread of my life, not theirs. I asked myself, “What have I been doing to create this reality?” Quite simply, I hadn’t been getting on the court or playing a starring role in my own blockbuster. I had been letting life happen to me vs., co-creating with life and being accountable for my own actions and patterns. These patterns were really an inner cry for help. I kept living the same reality of moving between jobs, states and countries to get away and start fresh. But I wasn’t able to look at the big picture. No matter where I went, these patterns would keep recurring until I learned to recognize each situation as an opportunity to learn something new. Each new job was a lesson. And the lesson would keep coming up until I recognized it and greeted it full-heartedly.

Is there a situation in your life that is causing you frustration? Challenge yourself to look at the situation with fresh eyes and ask yourself, “What is this situation trying to teach me? What can I learn from this?” By opening your mind up to the potential of new possibilities, life can reward us in ways we never expected.

Shannon Kaiser is an inspirational travel writer, author, adventure junkie and art director. Shannon is founder of playwiththeworld.com, an adventure site dedicated to helping others love life fully. Connect with her there.

Photo credit: Evan Jackson

If you talk to most traditional artists and entrepreneurs, and they’re being honest, many will share their own variation of [Pearl S.] Buck’s…compulsion [to create] that, in many of its traits, seems to rise to the level of addiction, in part because they love what they do so much they start to feel empty when they’re not doing it. Others, who are very driven to get “there” and who know that getting there almost always takes a long, intense effort calculate that the more they work, the faster they’ll get to a place of mastery, genius, respect.

There is some truth to this. But there’s also a very dark underbelly. The lure of creative-obsessive behavior pulls you toward a single vehicle of creative output but ends up pushing you away from everything and everyone [...]]]> Today, Jonathan Fields shares an excerpt from his book, “Uncertainty: Turning Fear & Doubt Into Fuel for Brilliance.” Check out his video – it gave me chills! xo Kris

If you talk to most traditional artists and entrepreneurs, and they’re being honest, many will share their own variation of [Pearl S.] Buck’s…compulsion [to create] that, in many of its traits, seems to rise to the level of addiction, in part because they love what they do so much they start to feel empty when they’re not doing it. Others, who are very driven to get “there” and who know that getting there almost always takes a long, intense effort calculate that the more they work, the faster they’ll get to a place of mastery, genius, respect.

There is some truth to this. But there’s also a very dark underbelly. The lure of creative-obsessive behavior pulls you toward a single vehicle of creative output but ends up pushing you away from everything and everyone else in your life. Connections you once had to people and activities, even those you claim are the most important things in your universe, wither and eventually die of neglect. Stepping out of your something-from-nothing bubble turns into pain, so you stay in, where you know your trusted muse will always arrive at some point to offer up the next hit. It becomes a “chicken and egg” thing fairly quickly.

Was it the bad relationship that pushed you to invest all your energy in your next company or book? Or did the fact that you committed every ounce of psychic juice to your endeavor destroy your relationship with the “outside world” in the first place? It doesn’t really matter.

Either way, the cycle may yield great art or great business, but a great life?

Doubtful.

I’ve dealt with this very tension many times in my own creative life. Each pursuit begs to become all-consuming. It teases you, then wraps its arm around you and lures you in. It’s an amazing place to be, living on the marrow of conception and evolution. The world outside, a ghost of normalcy, can be easily forgotten.

That place where you live and breathe conception and evolution, it’s been claimed, must exist. It’s where great work comes from, where businesses are birthed, legends are made, and art comes to life. To visit this place and then return is necessary. But to believe that this place is a sustainable path to creation or to life is delusional. Trying to stay on that path for an extended period of time always ends in disaster.

Not just because your relationships implode. They do. Not just because your body, your health, and your ability to check back into reality abandon you. They do. Not just because the demise of your outer world brings sadness, which is sand in the gears of productivity. It does.

Most of all, it’s because you cannot sustain the level of conception and execution required to mount a breathtaking, lifetime-worthy body of work when all you do it work.

With rare exceptions, great creations—from paintings to companies to products to movies, songs, and books—don’t come from life in a vacuum. One of the reasons [famed story guru, Robert] McKee says great storytellers often don’t hit their stride until later in life is because they have to have spent a massive number of hours mastering the craft; they also need to have lived enough outside the pursuit of their craft to have something worth saying….

It’s the same with any endeavor, any quest to create something brilliant from nothing. It takes years to master a craft, from building a business to writing music. But craft alone doesn’t get you there.

Genius requires craft plus insight.

Insight rarely comes while you are constrained to the work and only the work. Indeed, it most often comes when you step away from your work, when you spend time with others in seemingly unrelated worlds. When you sit, walk, and breathe into stillness When you meditate. Talk. Listen. Love. Live. Be.

Counterintuitive as it sounds, it’s the undoing that plants the seeds of the greatest doing.

What I create in any one medium is made far richer by the fact that I spend considerable time outside that medium. It may mean my path to mastery takes longer. So be it. In the end, I create better businesses because I write. I write better books, essays, and posts because I relish my time as a dad, son, brother, husband, friend, yogi, student, and teacher.

Excerpted from “Uncertainty” by Jonathan Fields by arrangement with Portfolio Penguin, a member of Penguin Group (USA), Inc., Copyright (c) 2011 by Jonathan Fields.

Jonathan Fields is a dad, husband, New Yorker, author and speaker, serial wellness-industry entrepreneur, blogger at JonathanFields.com and author of “Uncertainty: Turning Fear and Doubt Into Fuel for Brilliance.”

It will happen later. His best friend will ask you out instead. You’ll be kissed in the movies instead of on a beach. You’ll end up going to a different school because the one you thought you’d get into didn’t work out.

She’ll move away. Someone else will move in next door. She’ll be a little weird at first, a little more shy, but ultimately really good at riding bikes and playing dolls.

That part you always wanted will go to that other girl instead. And you’ll rock it out in the chorus like your life depended on it. Because on some level it does.

The road you were going to take will be flooded and closed. The inn where you were going to stay will be under renovations. He’ll be taller than you thought. And have a funny accent. But will be a good kisser nonetheless.

You’ll get a flat tire on the way to that crucial meeting and end up peeing your pants laughing with the gas station attendant over a copy [...]]]>

It will happen later. His best friend will ask you out instead. You’ll be kissed in the movies instead of on a beach. You’ll end up going to a different school because the one you thought you’d get into didn’t work out.

She’ll move away. Someone else will move in next door. She’ll be a little weird at first, a little more shy, but ultimately really good at riding bikes and playing dolls.

That part you always wanted will go to that other girl instead. And you’ll rock it out in the chorus like your life depended on it. Because on some level it does.

The road you were going to take will be flooded and closed. The inn where you were going to stay will be under renovations. He’ll be taller than you thought. And have a funny accent. But will be a good kisser nonetheless.

You’ll get a flat tire on the way to that crucial meeting and end up peeing your pants laughing with the gas station attendant over a copy of Us Magazine. And someone else will fill in for you because they always do.

You won’t get that dream job like you thought you would. It will go to someone else with far less creative drive and vision than you. Someone far better suited for a cubicle than you.

You’ll be put in groups with people who put your panties in a wrinkle. You’ll sit next to someone on the plane who you’d never talk to except that they won’t shut up … and you’ll end up staying in touch for years and taking family vacations together.

Five years after you graduate, life won’t look anything like you would have imagined. You’ll be single when you thought you’d be married. You’ll have kids when you thought you’d be in the Peace Corps. That trip to Laos will get delayed because you’ve got to stay home and take care of your grandmother. Laos will be there. You’re grandmother won’t always.

He’ll move overseas and oddly the Atlantic Ocean between you will bring you closer than you ever dreamed possible. You won’t get engaged, married, or pregnant when you thought. You’ll miss the bus/train/plane/ferry that you thought you just HAD to be on.

You’ll fall off the turnip truck. You’ll jump on a different bandwagon than you intended. You’ll get fired when you thought you ought to be getting hired.

You’ll realize you forgot the outfit you had planned to wear and that the shoes are all wrong now that you have a full-length mirror to see the whole outfit. Your shirt will be wrinkled and you’ll spill red wine on your white jeans.

Your dog will eat your five-year plan. You’ll drop your Blackberry in the toilet (at least once). Your computer will crash, and you’ll delete the first draft of your magnum opus. You’ll accidentally delete your hard drive and end up with a clean slate.

You’ll show up late to the date with the guy you were sure was going to fit into your husband suit and realize he’s less than graceful under stress and not so flexible (better to know now than later).

When you thought you’d be baking pies and living behind your very own white picket fence you’ll find yourself doing something so entirely different you couldn’t have even imagined it a year before. There will be moments when you’ll look around and not even recognize your own life … in a good way.

You’ll take a wrong turn and end up in an entirely different city than you intended. You’ll dial the wrong number and end up in love with an entirely different person than you intended.

You’ll flunk out and end up taking five years instead of four to graduate. You’ll have your heart broken when you were sure you were with the one and then meet the other one a month later. You’ll move to a new city to start a new business with those perfect new business partners and then it will all go to shit. And you’ll move across the country again only to realize that that’s where you belonged the whole time.

You’ll drive as far away from home as possible thinking that it will make you feel free. Then you’ll get homesick and drive back four months later because you suddenly feel trapped.

You’ll imagine the open road, country music playing loud, you singing at the top of your lungs and flirting with a new man in every town. And then you’ll invite someone to come with you on a whim and realize driving around the country by yourself was a terrible idea anyway … and that it’s way more fun when you’re traveling with someone you love.

You won’t do it at the right time.

You’ll be late.

You’ll be early.

You’ll get re-routed.

You’ll get delayed.

You’ll change your mind.

You’ll change your heart.

It’s not going to turn out the way you thought it would.

It will be better.

Earlier this year Kate traveled 19,000 miles by car and 11,000 miles by plane (plus 300 miles by boat) on her Freedom Tour. Follow her adventures today as she embarks on The Freedom Tour 2.0 by visiting: http://katemoller.com.

Photo credit: jeco

Today I pulled back the mulch in my garlic bed. I was greeted by tender green shoots, holding aloft the fulfillment of a promise.

In October, I planted about 120 garlic cloves and let them sprout. Shortly before the first frost, I gave them a good blanket of straw, and we agreed to meet again after winter. I also put on a few extra layers, and now here we are, at the threshold of spring. The garlic, I must say, has a serious case of bed-head. As for me, well, I’m sufficiently groomed for gardening, I suppose.

It’s the same routine every year, this seed-to-plant-to-harvest-to-seed cycle. And it is still miraculous – because try as we might, we still don’t understand what created the spark of life that permeates our world. So I stand amazed as the plants awaken from their nap and demand my interaction.

It’s not just Nature performing this stage show, but also her sister Metaphor. Hand in hand, they remind us that winter’s spells are temporary. Dormancy is only a [...]]]>

Today I pulled back the mulch in my garlic bed. I was greeted by tender green shoots, holding aloft the fulfillment of a promise.

In October, I planted about 120 garlic cloves and let them sprout. Shortly before the first frost, I gave them a good blanket of straw, and we agreed to meet again after winter. I also put on a few extra layers, and now here we are, at the threshold of spring. The garlic, I must say, has a serious case of bed-head. As for me, well, I’m sufficiently groomed for gardening, I suppose.

It’s the same routine every year, this seed-to-plant-to-harvest-to-seed cycle. And it is still miraculous – because try as we might, we still don’t understand what created the spark of life that permeates our world. So I stand amazed as the plants awaken from their nap and demand my interaction.

It’s not just Nature performing this stage show, but also her sister Metaphor. Hand in hand, they remind us that winter’s spells are temporary. Dormancy is only a phase. Darkness is never eternal. Every yin has its yang, and life has its flow. Out of every cold and somber period, I also have sprung forth with renewed vigor and purpose.

I embrace all the seasons, and marvel at the unfair share of complaints filed against winter. Yes, it is cold. But it also can be a very productive time. In winter, we gather compact energy and have an opportunity to turn our attention inward. We conserve our resources. We have time to experience great peace in meditation. While these activities can be restful, they are a far cry from dormancy.

If we get a bit down, we have a promise to help us keep going. That promise is simple: The garden bed, once overflowing with autumn’s bounty, will spring into life again.

This promise is held in the tiniest of places, packed tightly into the seeds the garden gives us to save. Not only are the seeds tiny, but they are super-abundant, uncountable, even unmanageable. We gather them and keep them safely through winter. By using only a fraction of them, we’ll have more results than we can imagine.

Do we doubt it now and then? Do we sometimes wonder if the process will break down at some point? Sure we do. But behind it all, those seeds are lying in wait, as if they are secrets hidden by winter’s dim light. Then comes that mysterious and galvanizing spark …

So now the march toward aphelion awakens us, and we relive the unrestrained renewal of all living things. Energy breaks loose all around us. Spring blossoms peek in the windows as fresh tendrils turn the doorknob.

The newness in the air fills our lungs and reminds us that we can do anything. It’s time to grab a handful of seeds and step outdoors. Life demands our interaction.

Photo credit: AlyssssylA

When I was 6 years old, I came home and said to my Mom: “Mom, show and tell should be me every day!”

She gently told me that the other kids needed a chance, and I said: “They don’t want to- and they’re begging me to do it!”

My first-grade teacher set up a system where I went to a different grade each day to do my show and tell. I loved it, and it was a big part of my creative dream to share what I was finding each day. I didn’t know it was a “creative dream” in first grade, but I knew what I loved doing and what brought me joy.

We all know this.

We become conditioned to make a living instead of making a creative dream life. We can do both, if our creative dream isn’t yet or ever meant to create enough money to live on.

When I was 10 years old, I told my Mother: “I’m supposed to be a beacon of hope and write books for the world.”

She told me [...]]]>

When I was 6 years old, I came home and said to my Mom:
“Mom, show and tell should be me every day!”

She gently told me that the other kids needed a chance, and I said:
“They don’t want to- and they’re begging me to do it!”

My first-grade teacher set up a system where I went to a different grade each day to do my show and tell. I loved it, and it was a big part of my creative dream to share what I was finding each day. I didn’t know it was a “creative dream” in first grade, but I knew what I loved doing and what brought me joy.

We all know this.

We become conditioned to make a living instead of making a creative dream life. We can do both, if our creative dream isn’t yet or ever meant to create enough money to live on.

When I was 10 years old, I told my Mother:
“I’m supposed to be a beacon of hope and write books for the world.”

She told me to eat my peanut butter sandwich, and I wrote my first book that summer, and then wasn’t published for 25 more years.

In between, from ages 14 to 26, I had hundreds of jobs after my Grandfather told me: “Do everything you can think of doing so you know what you don’t want to do for the rest of your life.”

I found out a lot about humility and service and what I didn’t want to do through doing all of those jobs. I also found out a lot about what I loved doing and what brought me joy.

When I was 26, I started trying to live as the artist and writer that I knew I was, and couldn’t figure out how to make a living, so I opted out of the money system and lived on barter and trade for 10 years. I also discovered that creative dreams don’t die. They are very resilient and will wait forever.

Even though I attended college for 4 years, I decided that a degree was meaningless and quit before receiving one. I told people that I went to “collage,” because I was collaging my creative dream life together.

When I was 35, I published my first book; A Creative Companion, and started my business; Camp SARK. I created the books and products I had dreamed about all of my life, and a business to support the structure. Many books and hundreds of products later, through all my business successes and mistakes, I find myself at 56, as eager and excited about my creative dreams as I was when I began- perhaps more excited.

One of my many mentors was Maya Angelou, and I appeared on a national TV show with her. The show consisted of talking about how my creative dreams had been supported by Maya Angelou, and audience members whose creative dreams were being supported by SARK. It really showed me the value of talking about our creative dreams, sharing the processes, what worked and didn’t, what wisdom we gather along the way with each other. This energy MOVES MOUNTAINS.

I created a book called Make Your Creative Dreams REAL, and a card game to play about this book. I’ve witnessed countless businesses and great ideas become real from people working with these materials.

In April 2010, I launched my first comprehensive online and on the phone course called Dream Boogie: Dancing from Dreaming to DOing.

We gather in Dream Boogie for 8 fun and focused weeks, to discover and accelerate our creative dreams, and gain support from our creative community.

Some people launch businesses, others create systems for self-love and care, all experience growth of more money, love, time or revelations. We all do our transformational work. I offer “intuitive flashes” which are my quick intuitive answers to any creative dream questions. I’ve long been an intuitive, I just haven’t named it as such. The questions and answers are profound. There’s a live weekly class, and a reframe of homework, called “ownwork.” Each week, there’s a “Boogie Book” to work from, and everyone receives copies of everything at the end of the course. There are also videos by me, and audio interviews with other “Dream DOers.” There’s a colorful website to interact with everyone on, and a voluntary program of “Boogie Buddies.” People can participate as much, or as little as they wish. Both styles will create growth and results.

I am thrilled to offer our third Dream Boogie session and witness all of the transformations, revelations and incandescent learning that takes place. Our creative dreams FLOURISH with this kind of attention and care, and the world will turn eagerly towards every creative dream in process, and help it to grow and GLOW for all to see. I invite you to experience it and the successes that will result.

What if you could have your life look the way you want it to…? No, exactly the way you want it to: not just the things you have, but right down to the way that you are. What if we all thought this way?

As a new and first time mom, I have had plenty to learn in the past few months as well as plenty for which to give thanks. This “designing your life” business is what I have had the privilege to teach over the past two decades. If I didn’t know what I have learned about designing my life, I would most likely… yell at my husband for not helping enough, quietly grumble to myself instead of chatting with him and my newborn, work in an office like my mother did and rob Peter to pay Paul on a regular basis. These are all my default ways of being and doing, to which I would readily revert had I not the tools to act differently.

If you had [...]]]>
By Johanna Sawalha

What if you could have your life look the way you want it to…? No, exactly the way you want it to: not just the things you have, but right down to the way that you are. What if we all thought this way?

As a new and first time mom, I have had plenty to learn in the past few months as well as plenty for which to give thanks. This “designing your life” business is what I have had the privilege to teach over the past two decades. If I didn’t know what I have learned about designing my life, I would most likely… yell at my husband for not helping enough, quietly grumble to myself instead of chatting with him and my newborn, work in an office like my mother did and rob Peter to pay Paul on a regular basis. These are all my default ways of being and doing, to which I would readily revert had I not the tools to act differently.

If you had suggested this idea to me years ago, I probably would have bitten your head off! Humility did not come with my package, no matter how wacky of a design I had given my life. I would probably also not feel right about having a nanny if I were home, like it would be too lavish and luxurious or something. However, now that is how I have intentionally designed it. I designed things the way I wanted, which means I work (from home) on my passion of having people achieve their dreams; and I have a nanny when necessary! I want it all, and I want the same for everyone. Still, I have just used one example of work/life balance. There are many more ways to design your life!

We believe the more you address each and every area of your life, the happier you become. To be deeply happy is to have each area of your life make you proud. We have found there is often a lack of deliberate design in most people’s lives. Generally, people find a way to adapt to any situation or circumstance, and become stuck in their explanations and excuses for why their life is the way it is. Over time, we start to believe our own explanations, and it becomes more and more difficult to believe something else is possible since we are so accustomed to the status quo. Piece by piece, you can actually design your life and address your fears, thoughts, and deepest beliefs. It takes some thinking, creating, inventing and dreaming. Still, just to consider designing your life can move you to action and lead you toward the life of your ideals, once and for all.

Five Ways to Start Designing Your Life Today:

1. Dream of how you want it to be.
Dreaming is an active practice that should be separated from your strategies and action plans in life. Mostly people don’t make this separation, and they think that everything they dream about requires being put into practice. Not so. The practice of dreaming in and of itself sustains your vision for your life and should happen daily.

2. Track your excuses.
“Because, because, because…!” Can you hear your excuses talking to you? If you don’t, they probably pass you right by like they do most of us. Practice hearing and tracking your excuses, and better yet, refute them. They are telling you to blow off the things that in the end will make you happy and proud; instead, do the exact opposite!

3. Account for what you are doing.
Believe it or not, much of your ability to be accountable has everything to do with time management. The more you address how you spend your time, the more accountable you can become. Declare what you are going to do today. At the end of the day, account for whether it was accomplished or not. Stay away from judging “done” as “good” and “undone” as “bad.” You are simply accounting for it, which leaves you with the clarity to figure out what is missing in your planning and do better next time.

4. Purge your disappointments.
To “purge” something is to write out what is bothering, upsetting, or worrying you. Doing this will make it easier to distinguish between your personal bogeymen and the real issues to tackle and actions to take.

5. Communicate your grumblings.
Most people do not voice their gripes because they are afraid of how it might sound, and they end up not saying anything at all. Make a list of the things you are not saying. We never get artful at communicating because we don’t practice! Voicing your grumblings solves half the problem itself; thereby fixing the situation and leaving you happy and satisfied.

Johanna Sawalha has been in the personal development field for the past two decades and just recently stepped down from the Senior Vice President position at The Handel Group to care for her newborn son. She is still an executive coach and spokesperson for HG – coaches for MIT, Stanford U,  and Conde Nast.

Although I love yoga and have been practicing for 13 years, I am not here to tell you how wonderful it is and how you need to do more of it.

I *am* here to tell you about the value of having some sort of practice. I define practice as “What you do with regularity, even when you don’t feel like doing anything else.” I firmly believe that incorporating some sort of practice, or activity, into your normal routine – whether it’s yoga, running, knitting, cooking, walking, drawing, cleaning, or anything else you can absorb yourself in – is one the best ways (if not THE best way) to help you feel a little calmer, a little clearer, more able to deal with whatever life brings.

Scientists estimate that the average person has 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those 60,000, I’d wager that only two or three are actually worth listening to. Having a practice gives your mind just enough activity to keep it occupied so that you can start to hear [...]]]>

Although I love yoga and have been practicing for 13 years, I am not here to tell you how wonderful it is and how you need to do more of it.

I *am* here to tell you about the value of having some sort of practice. I define practice as “What you do with regularity, even when you don’t feel like doing anything else.” I firmly believe that incorporating some sort of practice, or activity, into your normal routine – whether it’s yoga, running, knitting, cooking, walking, drawing, cleaning, or anything else you can absorb yourself in – is one the best ways (if not THE best way) to help you feel a little calmer, a little clearer, more able to deal with whatever life brings.

Scientists estimate that the average person has 60,000 thoughts per day. Of those 60,000, I’d wager that only two or three are actually worth listening to. Having a practice gives your mind just enough activity to keep it occupied so that you can start to hear the voice that comes from somewhere much deeper than your mind – your innate wisdom. Whether you call it your gut instinct, your inner voice, or your women’s intuition, we’ve all got it. We probably all have stories of very specific times when we actually heard it loud and clear. The problem is that for the most part it gets drowned out by those 60,000 other thoughts. Doing your practice is like giving a hyper kid a Rubik’s cube – suddenly things get a lot quieter.

When you start creating space in your life for your intuition to rise to the surface, the inevitable dramas we all experience lose some of their power to rile you. Your life won’t magically turn into a fairy tale. But bumps in the road—whether they’re small, like traffic, or big, like losing your job—won’t have as much power over your state of mind. When you have a bad day, if you have a practice, you’ll know exactly what to do to help yourself get back on track. How many people can say that?

Here are some tips for figuring out what your practice is going to be and how to make it a part of your life:

What makes you feel better?
Is there something you do that always makes you feel better – even just a little bit? It could be something formal, like a yoga class, or something you do on your own, like gardening or knitting. Anything that makes you feel more relaxed is a great candidate.

What’s calling to you?
If you can’t think of anything you’ve already tried that’s a good practice candidate, is there something you’ve always told yourself you’ll do when you’ve got a little more time, money, or moxie? Anything that’s been making your ears perk up when you hear it mentioned in conversation? If it’s something you don’t know how to do yet, start by just familiarizing yourself with it. You don’t need to be a master – that’s why they call it practice.

What can you feasibly fit into your regular life?
You may feel at one with the world on the ski slopes, but if you only get to go skiing once a year, it ain’t a practice. You don’t have to do something every single day, but you want to be able to do whatever it is that soothes your soul on more days than not.

Start small
Whatever you choose, you do not have to do it for 2 hours every morning for it to “count.” Beware of using whatever you do to feel better as an excuse to feel worse. (I’ve been down that road, and I can promise you, it’s not fun.) If you choose gardening, watering for 10 minutes counts. Some days you’ll be able to do more of your practice than others. That’s ok.

Some practices are for emergencies only
I had a very deep chocolate chip cookie practice once. I went through a capital-T, capital-B Tragic Breakup that had me chowing cookies like my life depended on it. Yoga also helped me make it through that particularly rough spot, but even it couldn’t convince me that getting out of a bed was a good idea. Only the siren call of chocolate, butter, and sugar could do that. Luckily my dependence on cookies started to wane along with my heartache.

(AKA change your thoughts…change your life!)

OK people time to clear out the winter dust bunnies and make some head space! Let’s start the spring clean with the question, “What is your racket?” Meaning what is the bullshit story that you tell yourself about yourself, that gets in your way? When I was in my 20’s I used to declare, ”I can’t cook”. Finally my mother said,”Ter, that is so tired…if you can READ you can COOK. Why don’t you just say what you really mean, which is that you don’t WANT to cook? Which is fine.” Um…well yea I guess I never thought of that. I was afraid if I learned how to cook OR type for that matter, someone would expect it of me. I decided not to learn to do either for a long time, until I wanted to, for myself.

De-Cluttering Your Cranium. . Makin’ Room for the Good Stuff!

Step One: Identifying Your Racket. What are the negative tales you think, say or feel about yourself? What do [...]]]>

(AKA change your thoughts…change your life!)

OK people time to clear out the winter dust bunnies and make some head space! Let’s start the spring clean with the question, “What is your racket?” Meaning what is the bullshit story that you tell yourself about yourself, that gets in your way? When I was in my 20’s I used to declare, ”I can’t cook”. Finally my mother said,”Ter, that is so tired…if you can READ you can COOK. Why don’t you just say what you really mean, which is that you don’t WANT to cook? Which is fine.” Um…well yea I guess I never thought of that. I was afraid if I learned how to cook OR type for that matter, someone would expect it of me. I decided not to learn to do either for a long time, until I wanted to, for myself.

De-Cluttering Your Cranium. . Makin’ Room for the Good Stuff!

Step One: Identifying Your Racket.
What are the negative tales you think, say or feel about yourself? What do you tell yourself you CAN NOT do? Think of the ways you may put yourself down in front of others or alone. There are many reasons people do this. Not to threaten others, to say it before someone else can, because your parents taught you to be “humble” (now that is a load of crap for an ENTIRELY separate post) or the fear that feeling or saying good things about yourself makes you conceited etc. Another reason people limit themselves with lies is so they don’t have to do or risk anything. If I say I cannot cook then I don’t have to try and fail, right? It spares me from finding out I am a bad cook but it also robs me of the experience of trying and succeeding or trying and deciding I don’t enjoy cooking, which is totally different than saying I am incapable.

Step Two: Declaring The Limiting Belief a Lie.
Once you realize what your rackets are, take the time to journal about how these false beliefs came into being. Really think back to how the whole sorted thing got started and write about it. Remember how you felt at the time and write a comprehensive narrative about it. Connect the facts with the feelings. Then have one person you trust witness it for you. Read or tell them the story…then burn it. Yep I mean actually light it on fire and release it back into the universe and OUT OF YOUR EXPERIENCE. Please only burn someplace safe and legal. I had two of my adorable life coaching clients burn their racket lists together in a Manhattan apartment and video tape it for my viewing pleasure. It looked like the kitchen was about to go up in flames, so please don’t try THAT at home (although I laughed my head off every time I thought of them for days).

Step Three: Rewrite Your Script.
I have a t-shirt with that inscription that I have worn thin because I LOVE it so much. Here is the deal. It is your life. It is your story. If you don’t like the story line you are currently rocking…CHANGE IT! It is all on you to change your mind about whatever does not work for you. I had a friend who hated her legs and when her then boyfriend, now husband declared she had the best gams in town she feared he was actually making fun of her. As it became apparent that he truly felt this way she decided to go with it and see her legs as luscious instead of a liability. She has not regretted that decision and even wears short skirts now with a sassy attitude. I have no doubt she could have talked him out of it but why would she want to do that? Beauty and truth are very subjective. Why not see things in a way that empowers you? It is just as easy or easier and yields much more positive results.

Note: This is different than being in denial. We always have a choice as to how we will view a situation and I am suggesting viewing your life in a way that empowers you and taking responsibility for your own happiness…because you are the only one who can.

Step Four: Write Affirmations to Support Your New Script
An affirmation is just something you declare to be true. So now your job is to write affirmations about what you are creating. I AM SO HAPPY AND GRATEFUL NOW THAT I (insert affirmation here). Since the universe can only say yes, be specific with the words you choose. Use only positive language in the present tense.

Fear gets kicked up when we change our minds about things. Remember fear is just a FEELING, not a FACT. Now go make room in your mind for all of the life experiences that you are creating for this beautiful new beginning…SPRING! Let the Psychological Spring Clean begin!

As always I am here to help, nudge, clarify, support or challenge, if necessary.
Let me hear from you!

MANIFEST VISUALIZE CREATE!

Love Love Love
Your Crazy Sexy Life Coach,
Terri

P.S. By the way I am an AWESOME cook now because I want to be !

On Monday May 11th, hundreds of you will be participating in our online Adventure Cleanse Tune-up (ACT). First and foremost, I am so PROUD of you. You are brave, responsible, brilliant unicorns full of healing potential. Yeehaw!

Many of you have already started to upgrade your cabinets, fridge, pantry and the secret vodka stash in the laundry room. GREAT! Toss what no longer serves you. This is your weekend to move from the darkness into the light. Farewell artificial colors and flavors, preservatives, trans fatty acids (if New York City restaurants banned this stuff, so can you), saturated animal fat, unpronounceable chemicals, whey, casein, gluten, fructose, corn syrup, and hydrogenated non-foods. These are poisons not meant for your regal being.

Remember you are a god/dess. Poo on a plate won’t do! If you don’t believe in your beauty then shut your (former) pie hole and let me do the talking. YOU ARE STUNNING! This world will suffer if you’re [...]]]>
Wellness Warriors,

On Monday May 11th, hundreds of you will be participating in our online Adventure Cleanse Tune-up (ACT). First and foremost, I am so PROUD of you. You are brave, responsible, brilliant unicorns full of healing potential. Yeehaw!

Many of you have already started to upgrade your cabinets, fridge, pantry and the secret vodka stash in the laundry room. GREAT! Toss what no longer serves you. This is your weekend to move from the darkness into the light. Farewell artificial colors and flavors, preservatives, trans fatty acids (if New York City restaurants banned this stuff, so can you), saturated animal fat, unpronounceable chemicals, whey, casein, gluten, fructose, corn syrup, and hydrogenated non-foods. These are poisons not meant for your regal being.

Remember you are a god/dess. Poo on a plate won’t do! If you don’t believe in your beauty then shut your (former) pie hole and let me do the talking. YOU ARE STUNNING! This world will suffer if you’re not at your best, brightest and most fulfilled. I will suffer if you don’t shine. When you build a daily practice of honoring yourself, thoughts rearrange. The negative hot air loses power as the truth posies push through. Got it sparkle puss?

As a result of your efforts you’re gonna twinkle from the inside out. No one can package that in a fancy French bottle! Remember, it’s not about weight, disease reversal, fixing the blues (or your marriage). Start small. Love yourself at the cellular level.

This tune-up works because it focuses on rebuilding your terrain by increasing your alkalinity. That’s all you need to remember. By consuming more alkaline foods and less acidic foods you’ll feel better, look better, and have tons more energy. If you need a little pH refresher course, please read my recent post.

Only you can ignite the glow! Commit and try to be as consistent possible. But if you flub a day it’s OK. Don’t beat yourself up or succumb to a mega-binge. “Hey, I blew it anyway so why not get high on my favorite drug – food”. That’s dirty self-sabotage speak. This “tune-up” is NOT under the supervision of your ego. ACT and be guided by your higher self. He/she loves you dearly and believes that all your dreams are within reach.

So if you stumble just be kind and remember your divinity. Pay close attention to why and what hit your trigger. Pull out your Food & Lifestyle Journal and scribble the issues OUT of your tissues. Take a walk, bark into a pillow, call a buddy, soak in the tub, rent a funny movie, do what you need to do to break the habit and then slide back into your bikini (even if it’s currently too tight) and dive in again.

Some folks may try and discourage you from changing. They prefer you fat, sick, mad and exhausted. “Oh, that’s dangerous, I wouldn’t do that if I were you! Where will you get your protein? You’ll wither and die” Huh? Since when is a plant-based diet full of salads, veggies, steamed greens, juice, nuts, seeds, beans, sprouts, gluten-free grains and breads, yummy almond butter, pates, soups, smoothies, baked root vegetables, exercise, journaling, telling someone you love them, rolling in the grass while giggling – dangerous? Stand in your power and break from the human herd. Folks like that don’t want to you to look at yourself nude (emotionally & physically) because it puts pressure on them to do the same. Screw that, skinny dip!

I love each and every one of you. Good luck and remember to join the forum. I’ll be posting daily in the Life Lounge section under Adventure Cleanse Tune-up. For a detailed discussion on the different cleanse levels, check the forum.

Peace and power,
Kris