What To Do When You Doubt Everything and Want To Stay In Bed

Do you ever start questioning everything you’re creating, everything you’re working on and everything you’re working toward?

Do you sometimes wish you could just pull the covers over your head and stay in bed all day long?

Gurrrl, I feel you. Now before we go any further, I want you to know that you’re not alone.

Millions of highly successful people go through periods of questioning what the heck they’re doing and crave a few days off the grid and under the sheets. I know I do!

I’ve talked about it before — knowing your “why” is key to both success and longevity in any endeavor.

But once you’ve got that handled, you also need to proactively build in “NNT” time if you want to stay consistently engaged and on track. “What’s that crazy acronym?” you say.

Press play and I’ll explain how this simple concept will give you massive results, fast.

Warning: you’re about to hear me rap, so crank up your volume and get ready for some high-quality entertainment.

Since I shared my core daily NNT activities above, I also want to share my weekly NNT activities with you, too. It’s made a huge difference in my productivity and happiness.

I take at least one full day each week to completely disconnect from email, cell phone and the computer. No business advice or self-help books allowed; just pure non-work-related activities.

I can’t even begin to describe the massive impact this small change has made in my creativity, well-being, and most importantly, in my relationship. I strongly recommend you give this a try, too.

Take Action Now

Take five minutes right now and create your own list of NNT daily activities. Ready to go buck wild? Then outline your weekly, monthly and yearly NNT activities, too.

As you know, insight without action is a waste! So turn your insight into action right now.

In the comments below, share your exact list of daily NNT activities, and what type of impact gettin’ down with NNT will have your health, happiness and productivity.

And if you found this post useful, go ahead and share it with your friends. They’ll thank you for it!

For more information on how to optimize your life, visit marieforleo.com.

Photo credit: Luc de Leeuw

The Healing Power of Creativity

Creativity is a tremendous life-transforming tool that we all have the ability to access, whether we feel like we are artistically creative or not, to know more deeply who we truly are and to support us to create the lives we really want.

Creativity also heals.

As a child, I always wanted to express myself, to be free without limitations. Yet, I was conditioned to believe I needed to color in the lines, choose the right color that matches the others and make sure not to make a mess. I wanted to speak out loud all that I felt. Yet, I was taught that I needed to use my quiet voice and speak only when spoken to. I wanted to be bold, big and uninhibited yet, I feared I was “too much” and lessened my size.

The little one in me soon learned to wrap it up tight, be concerned about what other people would think, compare myself to others and worry if what I was doing really mattered. I learned to doubt myself, question myself and got caught in needing acceptance out in the world.

But now, as an adult, I am free to be own person. I am free to create my heart’s desire. But, I can’t do it alone. I need the little one inside of me to join me.

Igniting the energy of our child-selves, we tap into our free, authentic self-expression with total permission to be whomever and however we want in the moment. When we meet a project, a dream or an endeavor focused, concentrated and in the present moment, being true to ourselves and making choices based on this truth, creativity purifies.

Imagine your body (emotional, spiritual, physical and mental) is a chamber like a pipe. Inside the pipe are calcifications that have built up over time. Crud, roots, mud and waste corrode the pipe and create blocks. When we are fully present and engaged in a creative endeavor, the energy moves through us like water through the pipe and pushes out whatever is blocking it.

Creativity burns like a fire through the stuckness and dis-ease held in our bodies and turns what doesn’t serve us into ash. It dissolves the layers of conditioning that were put upon us and brings us closer to knowing who we truly are, our absolute nature and what we are capable of.

When we feel sleepy or bored and resist what we are being called to create, we fall into the trap of questioning who we are as a creative being. When we take ourselves too seriously, the energy in our body may get stuck, calcified or heavy. We may find ourselves depressed, ill or without real, palpable, expressive joy. Yet, when we connect to the creative aspect of everything we do, our body will awake, and we remember what it feels like to be vibrant and alive again.

Here are four ways to engage creativity to bring healing to our lives:

1. Play, laugh and have some fun. Choose to do something today that is fun and playful. This healing act supports you. Let go of pain from the past and know in your heart of hearts your life is of purpose. You will feel lighter, experience a sensation of release or anticipate with enthusiasm the direction you are headed. Celebrate and bring healing as you joyfully find laughter and experience a healthy release.

2. Let out the kid in you. When we played as children, we had a rich fantasy life. We dared to dream, run wild and had active imaginations. As adults, we lose this childlike, innocent quality. This is why it is good to reconnect with our little one within. He or she is still a large part of who we are and it is essential to our overall health and well-being.

Ask your child self what he or she would like to create to express themselves fully. Does she want to dance in the living room, throw a pot on a wheel? Does he want to climb trees or go for a hike in the wilderness? Schedule a creative play date and make sure you follow through.

3. Jump into the Unknown. Choose something new, daring and risky that will cause you to let go and dive into the wild abandon of the unknown. Maybe something in your life feels ready for a change. Why don’t you jump and make that change today? Prepare to jump into the unknown, to brave the height of the mountain and leap into mid-air. Begin by investigating the mystery of who you are to better discover yourself.

4. Be an Adventurer. Welcome the places that may make you feel uncomfortable or fear and use these situations as creative moments that create catalyst for change. Welcoming what makes you uncomfortable will cause you to immediately birth into a new way of being.

Loosen your grip, relax and be an adventurer in life. Are you drawn to paint? Pick up a brush! Have you always wanted a motorcycle? Take a cycle safety class. Are you interested in learning how to meditate? Start with sitting for five minutes a day.

Invent what you want in your life by getting out of your own way and allowing your creative expression to come through. Create for the pure joy of creating and strictly for the love of doing it. And as you do this, watch your body fill with light like the sun coming out behind the clouds.

Live freely! Live healthfully! Be you!

Lynn Zavaro has a master’s degree in counseling psychology and her book and card deck set, “The Game of You™- An Interactive Way to Know Yourself, Create the Life You Want” offers a powerful, profound and fun experience of self-discovery and transformation.

Photo credit: Samantha Kira Harding

Five Ways to Get the Most Out Your Next Creative Retreat

A creative retreat is the quintessential artist’s or writer’s dream. Time to tend your creative spark, think long, interrupted thoughts, meander, recharge and burrow into that project you’ve been flirting with.

Someone feeds you delicious food, you share tea or a glass of wine with other artists at the end of each gratifying day, hike in the bucolic countryside to clear your mind, nap when needed. Best of all, no interruptions: no children, aged parents or social media tugging at the hem of your attention.

Creative retreats are life-changing and can make a tremendous difference to your work and your confidence — as long as you’re a little bit prepared. Otherwise, you might find your expectations suck the creative juice right out of you, and you end up doing a lot more self-flagellation than creating.

Here are the five principles I use when I lead — or take — a retreat.

Lower Your Standards

When asked how he managed to write a poem almost every day (including the day he died!), the poet William Stafford replied, “I lowered my standards.”

The opposite tends to happen, especially when going on a creative (or any kind of) retreat. “I’ll write a chapter an hour, paint a new series of 50 paintings, find a fresh angle for my photography, I’ll eat only green smoothies and do yoga the rest of the time.” All that striving and impossible goal setting? It kills the retreat vibe and the possibility of getting your truest work done — and certainly kills the creative renewal you are seeking.

You know that good advice when you’re packing for a trip to take out half of what you just put in your suitcase? Same thing goes for what you plan to do on a retreat. Cut it in half. And then in half again. I beg you.

Clearly State What Will Be Enough

Last year I was gifted a week’s writing retreat by the venerable Fetzer Institute, and I set very clear “conditions of enoughness,” as I call them, for my week: no email, no Twitter, no Facebook; finishing a first draft of a new project; connecting with the other writers by being present and listening fully each evening. Naming these tangible facts created a foundation that allowed me to do the kind of deep writing and thinking I had been craving, as well as nap, take walks with my new friends and leave wildly inspired and renewed.

When you bring together lowering your standards and naming in facts what is enough for your creative time, the wild goodness you crave has a place to gather, and monkey mind has a bone to chew on (“She’s doing what she said she would … hmm, maybe I can shut up for a minute …”).

Declare a Time Element

On retreat, it’s vital you follow your desires, enjoy plenty of rest and play, and by deciding when and for how long you will work, you give yourself a gentle framework of satisfaction and containment. Otherwise, the endless expanse of time can be paralyzing. So maybe you paint from 9 a.m. to12 p.m. everyday, and meander the rest of the time. Or you write in 15-minute timed intervals with 1-minute breaks for one hour, then take a 1-hour photography break. On the writing retreats I lead, I start people off with 60 minutes and, as the week progresses, the writing periods get longer. This lets people build their creative muscles without getting overwhelmed.

Be sure to lower the bar on your time element! Just because you have 14 hours or so of being awake doesn’t mean you can create for 13 1/2 of them.

Ensure What you Do is Reasonable for You on an Average Day

The lure of a retreat can lure you into believing you are super-human — there will be no dishes, no cooking, no email, so certainly you will be transformed into someone who wears a cape and can do anything! As you are planning your retreat, keep in mind that you will, in fact, still be you. If you are not someone who writes after 3 p.m., this will probably not change on retreat. If you are not someone who gets up at 5 a.m. and writes for four hours without coffee, you won’t be that someone on retreat. Plan for an average “you” day, and you will find yourself supported to get great work done, with plenty of free time to fill up your creative well.

Declare Yourself Satisfied Even if You Don’t Feel Satisfied

This is one of the most powerful ideas I teach. You did what you said you would do — say, write for 2 hours, no checking email, then take a “noticing” walk with your camera, then read poetry and meditate. You get to the end of your day and you feel disappointed, or worried you aren’t using your retreat wisely if you aren’t wringing every bit of writing life out of it. You are so adorably normal!

The very best way to deal with this feeling is to say, out loud (yes, you feel silly doing this — so what?), “I did what I said I would and that it is enough. I am satisfied even if I don’t feel satisfied.” One of the most insidious — and common — ways we undermine our creativity is by belittling what we did. Learn to rest in what you have accomplished, honor it, and you’ll be infused with new energy and well-being. Train your awareness to notice the good and the real.

Writing retreats have been such a soul blessing to me, and to the thousands of creative souls I’ve been honored to facilitate. They can help you unsnarl a plot, dream up an angle for your blog and finally write that book proposal. But most precious of all, they remind you of why you create: how creating brings you in contact with the very heartbeat of life, the connection to all that is, and the overwhelming delight of being alive.

Please give yourself the gift of a creative retreat soon — and be sure and take the tad of time (takes like 10 minutes) to decide what will be enough so you can get the most out of your dream.

Join me, Jennifer Louden, in Taos July 24-30 for the 10th year of my World Famous Writing Retreat. Details here.

Yoga for Artists: Unleash Your Creativity

I have been in the art world for nine years as a critic, curator, theorist, philosopher and artist. Most of my endeavors place me in front of a computer writing reviews, press releases, essays, catalogues and the like. This has caused my erector spinae to shorten and my rhomboids to extend beyond their normal limits. These muscles are imperative for a straight spine and an open heart but are consistently put at risk by my typing. Because my arms are always in front of my chest, I develop knots in my shoulders that ultimately travel up my neck and cause tension migraines. And of course, carpal tunnel syndrome is nearly inevitable when you do nothing but type on a keyboard all day long. The worst part about being at a computer non-stop is the stress that it places on the nervous system. An illuminated screen bombarding your retinas is not the most relaxing thing in the world. And with constant stress it is very difficult, if not impossible, to be creative with writing.

About three years ago, I began practicing yoga to gain more flexibility, and since then I’ve had limited to no pain. The restoratives, back bends, hip openers, arm balances, neck stretching, shoulder strengthening and core work have aided each of my ailments and corrected the imbalance in both my physicality and my nervous system. With a relaxed nervous system, emotions are allowed to move throughout the body and exit freely. I know that I am not the only person to feel these impediments; it’s an occupational hazard from being an artist.

Painters, sculptors, photographers, writers, new genre artists and musicians usually have shoulder and neck pain along with posture problems and possible migraines. Actors, performance artists or musicians who stand a lot most likely have lower back pain, tight hamstrings and tight hip flexors, which lead to a plethora of other physical problems such as swelling of the feet and knee tenderness. All of these ailments and body aches are occupational hazards, but can be repaired by opening up to yoga.

If the physical restrictions are not enough to make a believer out of you or your artist friend, think of it this way: No one can be creative with a closed heart. If your shoulders are hunching forward because your arms are constantly in front of you in your day-to-day activities, how can you expect your heart to be open? Imagine how nice it would feel to lay across a bolster and give your shoulders a chance to release back. Not only would it take away the pressure in your upper body, but also release a ton of emotions that are being built up behind the wall of clavicles, scapulae and muscles wrapped around your chest.

Back bending is the number one movement that can aid artists in allowing creativity to flow through them. A simple 20 minutes a day of Sun Salutations and low backbends such as Bhujangasana (Cobra Pose), Salabhasana (Locust Pose) or Setu Bandha (Bridge Pose) can do wonders for allowing you to open your heart and mind to new inspiration. The beautiful thing about back bending is that it innately comes with counter poses – forward bends – which ultimately open the hips and hamstrings and give the spine more flexibility after being extended. As an added bonus, forward bends make you confront yourself and all of the insecurities you may face while dealing with lack of ingenuity.

Counter your backbends with postures such as Paschimottanasana (Seated Forward Fold), Janu Sirsasana (Head-to-Knee Forward Bend) and Dandasana (Staff Pose), while making sure you even out the spine between going backward and forward so you don’t eventually snap like a credit card. For balance between counter poses, do twists or Adho Mukha Svanasana (Downward-Facing Dog).

If you are one of those artists who can’t shut your brain off to do 20 minutes of asana (pose) practice, or you’re a smoker like so many artists are, calming the nervous system with restoratives can also assist in your endeavors to free your body of pain and your soul of creative infertility. Salamba Supta Virasana (Supported Reclining Hero’s Pose), Salamba Setu Bandha (supported Bridge Pose) and even Salamba Balasana (supported Child’s Pose) are a few of many yummy restorative poses that will make you feel like you have innovation seeping from your pores.

Whatever artistic medium you participate in, I urge you to begin practicing yoga. Whether it’s in the form of asana for physical pain, kirtan (literally translated as “to repeat,” usually in the form of singing), chanting, meditation or pranayama (breath control), knowing the art world very well, I guarantee it will change your life. It has changed mine.

Alexx Shaw is a yoga instructor and critic living in Los Angeles. She has a background in Art Theory, Art History and Philosophy from schools both domestically and abroad. Her yoga practice begins with asana as a gateway to the deeper teachings of yoga.

Photo Credit: lululemon athletica

Love List: Gratitude Journaling

Since I mentioned how much I love Bridget Morris’ journals in my last love list, I thought I’d put them to use this week with a little gratitude is the attitude doodling. As I’ve said before, the best way to tackle glass-half-empty thinking is to remind yourself of the things that are working in your life and to take stock of the beauty and special people/experiences that charge you up. Now, I know it’s tough to be grateful when you’re going through a difficult time. But honestly, that’s when you gotta suck it up and turn the energy around. It’s so much easier to put walls up and hunker down in your “woe is me, life sucks” bunker. Sound familiar?

Here’s a little something you may not know about me. I have never participated in a “why me?” pity party when it comes to canser but I have when it comes to vertigo. I get vertigo once every few years, and when it hits me, it hits hard. My “problem” pisses me off. It makes me shut down and get really frustrated. Do you know what I mean? Do you have a problem like that? Something that sucks your energy dry leaving no desire for green juice, yoga, walks, dates or spiritual medicine. It’s so easy to resist being grateful when you’re bound by the perception that life just isn’t going your way. Boo hoo, sniff sniff. Not today my friend. Burn off the haze and get busy counting your crazy sexy blessings! Remember, health isn’t just about what you eat, it’s also about dealing with what’s eating you. Joy has a tangible, physiological effect on the body. You can literally alter your body’s chemistry in a positive way by turning the stress down and the happiness up. Will you join me by commenting on one thing (or more) that you’re grateful for today?

I’ll go first…

1. I’m grateful for my pain-in-the-ass (and other expletives) vertigo. It teaches me to slow down, get focused and find balance.

2. I’m grateful for my favorite yoga DVDs that I can do in the comfort of my own home (“Transform Yourself with Jivamukti Yoga” and “Tias Little’s Freeing the Bird of Prana“)

3. I’m grateful for long drives, motorcycle rides and the brilliant colors of the changing fall leaves.

4. I’m grateful for my favorite hike up Overlook Mountain. It’s hard. It makes my butt throb and my thighs burn. Then voilà! The view at the top literally takes my breath away (and sometimes makes me want to puke because I’m scared of heights!).

5. I’m grateful for our decision to cancel our cable service. Too much noise.

6. I’m grateful for my new friend Sean Stephenson. His story is amazing. He is a sage and a funky prophet. Read his book, “Get Off Your ‘But’,” my friends. I devoured it in one day. His words are soul jumper cables. Check him out here, you’ll be learning a lot more about my friend Sean very soon as I am crazy sexy in love with him.

7. I am so grateful for almond butter in my smoothies! I usually use avocado, but recently I have fallen mad for the nut butter. Kale, cuke, almond butter, almond milk, stevia, pinch of cacao, banana, cinnamon, ice… OMG!

8. I am grateful for friends who honor my boundaries and give me space to grow and heal and love and fall and disappoint and love and be. Folks who demand too much of my energy get phased out. I send them love but don’t return the emails.

9. I am grateful for 8 hours of sleep. I never ever compromise on that and my bedroom supports my desire for yummy deep rejuvenation time.

10. I am so grateful to finally understand the following statement: “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”

Any thoughts?

Peace and gratitude,
Kris

Photo Credit: Thank You, Spinning Top, Broken TV, Almonds, Fence, Owl Nightlight,