By Juli Novotny on February 10, 2010

Entrepreneurial Mama

Juli

How do I juggle my life as an entrepreneur and full-time mom and still find time to feed my kids a healthy diet? The truth is that it is almost impossible to build a business, raise two small babies, feed them well and dress them right 100% of the time. But, there are a few tricks to do your best and do it right 90% of the time.

First, ask yourself: do you have to work, or do you just want to work? These are two very different things.

I started a business and decided that I wanted to see it through (kids or no kids), but I didn’t want to use daycare or even a full-time nanny. I wanted to hold onto my company and work toward my goals slowly (a lot more slowly than I had originally planned!). Typically, I am okay with this decision. But every so often, usually when a stressful event arises, I break down like the best of us. I either (a) threaten that I am throwing in the towel or (b) get mad that my company is not growing quickly enough. Then, I decide to work even harder.

However, having the “I can do it all” mentality often means that somebody is going to suffer. Whether it is your business, your free time, your relationship, or your kids—it is going to happen. And if it hasn’t yet, it will!

Establish daily goals and spend quality time with your kids!

My main daily goal is to be with my kids as much as possible when they aren’t napping. That means NO television, no internet, no texting (okay, maybe just a little texting) and so on when we’re together. I give them 100% of my attention and we play, we learn, we go to the park, we walk and we talk. I do not half-ass it. But, come naptime at 11am, it’s on! I’m all over the internet, making calls, multi-tasking, emailing, writing, designing, etc. I get as much done as I possibly can.

Do you want a nanny or babysitter? How does daycare sound?

Two days a week, I have a babysitter come and help out. She helps clean the house, get the babies up and change them, and maybe even feed them the food I’ve made. I can then use that time to prepare meals, do some extra work, have a green drink, go grocery shopping, and so on. One of those two days is spent driving to my “real” office and accomplishing, again, massive amounts of work in a short amount of time.

Evenings can be spent by going out as a family to a cool restaurant, Mom and Dad going out on a date, or heading to Grandma’s house for a meal (this is very helpful—somebody to help play with the kids and allow me time to relax).

I typically stop working at 5pm, no matter what, to just chill and eat and play with the boys. I rarely work at night, but when there are deadlines to meet or blog posts to finish, I put the babies to bed and work until around 10pm before hitting the sack. I’m an early bird.

Making time for Healthy Meals.

As far as healthy food goes, my job revolves around food. So it’s easier for me to make food than it might be for somebody else. I’ve become very fast and very good at it. It also helps that I am working on recipes for my blog and a cookbook in the works. This keeps me creative and cutting-edge. I have two little boys to practice on; what could be better?

I must say, though, that making dinner is NOT usually a fun thing for me to do. It’s not like the old days when cooking was my daily “meditation,” escape, and creative outlet. Now, it’s often a hurried process with screaming babies in the background demanding “apple juice, mama” or “hold me, mama” or just yelling nonsense like “dada baba, mama, dada” over and over again! I throw in a smile and a laugh here and there, but I am typically racing around the kitchen while pulling my hair out, trying to buy myself some “quiet” time by feeding babies bananas or giving in and pouring a tall glass of apple juice.

Still, it is important that you do give your children healthy meals, both to calm them and give them sustained energy. Healthy meals help them avoid the crashes that can cause temper tantrums. A friend of mine recently wrote this on her Facebook page:

“My kids amaze me. I made Juli Novotny’s Green Juice today and Zoe (2 years old) drank an entire cup! And when it was done, she declared “There’s a party in my tummy! So yummy! So yummy”. Srsly…I just didn’t think either of my kids would touch it with a 10 ft pole. Esp since it didn’t come in a box with Dora or a Princess on it. I was shocked. I thought she was going to throw it at me…”

My midwife once gave me a great piece of advice: “Just because you don’t like it, doesn’t mean your kid won’t.” (e.g., I hate when my ears get wet, so I always plug my son’s ears when I wash his hair). Our children ARE NOT US! They are their own individual beings. So give them what’s best for them—they will eat it! And they just might thank you for it, too.

Time for Yourself!

This is a must, and right now, in my life, it is lacking. I need it more than anything. Luckily, my “work” is my passion. I’m blessed in that way. I love doing it; so in a sense, it is my time away as well as my “day job!”

But I do hit walls. And when I do, my body/gut is very good at telling me what it needs. I get these little voices in my head that say “you’re thirsty” or “you’re tired” or “you need to relax and get a massage.” It sounds weird, but I am pretty tuned in to those voices. And if I ignore them, I become sick, over-tired, or rundown.

When I do hit this wall, I get a hot stone massage, an awesome pedicure, or I splurge on a great facial here in town. This hour forces me to sit down, read magazines, and forget about the work and baby world. It also serves to balance my workaholic personality with grounding greens and omegas. I drink tons of coconut water and green drinks. I enjoy an occasional glass of red wine and sometimes a good movie, too!

Try to exercise. I haven’t done this in awhile, but it’s a major piece of advice that I will give everybody—and what I mean by exercise is a good sweat. So whatever that means to you, do it. Hopefully it includes some fresh air (as opposed to a yoga studio or a gym). Get outside.
That’s my life! One big juggling match. Even if it’s not 100% perfect, I love it.

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6 Comments

I wanted to add that I also would consider going to therapy. Bring your spouse/partner, too.

For me therapy has been great for a few reasons:
1) helps me deal with all sorts of business and personal relationships.
2) makes me a better, more aware person.
3) gives me a place to vent (as opposed to venting to my family or friends non-stop) and get a neutral reaction as opposed to an annoyed family member.
4) when you’re pregnant and nursing you’re VERY emotional (hormones) and therapy helps me deal with those emotions. I have learned to take my emotions out of my business. That has helped with overall stress, too.
5) It has kept my stress level down and calmed my adrenals. My therapists helps me decipher when something is worth getting “fired up” over. People who work and have kids are highly stressed and that can be bad for long term overall health and adrenals, immune system, etc.
6) Therapy for couples is GREAT because it is a THIRD PARTY. Afterall, with both parents working it’s hard to manage the home life. Like, whose job is it to do the dishes or make dinner? Therapy has helped our family to better manage our lives and therefore curb the unwanted/unnecessary fighting. (fighting/arguing isn’t always a bad thing – we also learned that).

OK. So that’s that. I was driving today and thinking about all of this. If you have some extra money, I would highly suggest once a week or at least twice a month. :)

Thanks for all the yummy advice. So much to balance, but you seem to enjoy it and make it fun.

May I say…congrats on an excellent article and being the intelligent, loving, organized Mama you are 2 those lucky lil ones. Wes is a lucky guy…..and I am thrilled to know you!
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
xoxoxoxxo

It all sounds familiar! I love being a mom and I love being self-employed but it is a lot to juggle! I find routines and schedules are key to building resiliency. Everything flows much more smoothly and family members feel less stressed. Kids thrive with good routines. Thanks for sharing your thoughts Juli!

Great post, as I’m about to enter into motherhood soon and I am an entrepreneur. :)

Thanks for all the great advice, it is nice to hear others who feel the same way sometimes, and how they overcome their frustration. It makes you feel not so alone!