On Losing Weight and Regaining My Inner Cowgirl
In the spring of 2008, a book on the “New Arrivals” shelf of my small-town library jumped out at me: Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips by Kris Carr. I didn’t have cancer, didn’t know anyone with cancer, and yet, I was compelled to sign the book out. I think it was the cover photo of the cowgirl in the desert southwest that spoke to me.
“Wow,” I thought, “That used to be me. What in the world happened to that free spirit with her bohemian lust for life?”
Here’s what happened to her in a nutshell: Years and years of dieting had taught her not to trust her body’s hunger cues. With every diet, her eating became more disordered and her body’s physiology became even more imbalanced. She had forgotten that eating had anything to do with being hungry and dieted her way to 300 pounds. Yup, morbidly obese.
I suffered from fire-breathing-dragon heartburn, chronic fatigue, migraine headaches, lymphedema, adult acne, joint pain and a host of other debilitating symptoms. Walking to the end of the driveway was excruciating. My legs were swollen like tree trunks. I hadn’t seen my ankles in several years. I knew what was coming down the pike — diabetes, heart disease, pushing up daisies. I was way too young, but I felt hopeless. What was the answer? Gastric bypass?
Instead, I devoured that book. Kris’ story of being diagnosed with an extremely rare, incurable cancer and her journey toward health and healing was so inspirational. A big part of her healing journey involved adopting a raw foods lifestyle. The back of the book is loaded with resources and I started checking out websites and other books from the library.
The more I learned about eating raw foods, the more sold on the idea I became. It was when I read The Raw Food Detox Diet by Natalia Rose that I thought, “I can do this!” I loved her simple start-where-you-are approach.
On the summer solstice, June 21, 2008, I set an intention to change my relationship to food and regain my health and vitality. I soon traded in my scale for a juicer and entered the world of raw, living foods. I began to replace prepared and processed foods with fresh fruits, vegetables, sprouts, nuts and seeds.
It was a big change for me. BIG. I grew up in a Hungarian household, where I was weaned on chicken paprikash and stuffed cabbage. Vegetables were potatoes and corn. Not too many salads, because Dad thought “they taste green.” We celebrated with food. We mourned with food. I learned to use food for pleasure, for comfort, for reward.
As I grew into an adult and began living on my own, I couldn’t be bothered with cooking. Convenience was key — get more, faster. So I ate food in packages and racked up frequent flyer miles at the drive-thru windows. I joke that I thought Starbucks was a food group, but trust me, that wasn’t far from the truth. And, pick a diet, any diet, and betcha I’ve been on it.
There was the whole emotional component around food too. I’ve had to change my relationship with food. When we stop dieting, we have to trust that our body will tell us what it needs—and only what it needs.
Hello? Terrifying! I used to live to eat. Now, I’ve learned to eat to live.
A funny thing happened along this path of weight loss: by infusing my body with live enzymes, I began to feel more alive. All those symptoms I mentioned disappeared. My energy level shot through the roof. I sleep like a baby at night. My skin is smooth, clear and radiant. Over 120 pounds have melted away without counting a point, calorie, carb or fat gram.
I walk 5K every morning and every evening – my walking partner/Siberian husky, Maya, sees to that. I have a daily yoga practice. I love hiking in the woods (Maya too!), so I’m out there at least three-four times a week. I got a pair of inline skates for my birthday and began rollerblading this summer. No fatalities yet.
And, most recently, this cowgirl’s gotten back in the saddle. Yee Haw! My four-legged, 1,500-pound pals couldn’t be happier. Me too. I lost the equivalent of a whole person, but found that ol’ bohemian lust for life in the process.
- Posted by Guest Blogger on September 24, 2009 at 6:00 am
-
Tagged as: Enzymes, exercise, obesity, Raw Food, Spirituality, weight
Other posts by this author:
I can relate to so much of your story! Thanks for sharing this very inspirational journey.
What a beautiful story. Having lost 92 lbs. myself (so far), I can relate completely. Becoming vegan changed my entire relationship with food. So happy for you!!
Awesome life changing story!! You are an inspiration! Thank you for sharing your story of your amazing spirit and power.
YAY! E.M!! Great story, so inspirational. You are such an amazing strong women. Thanks for sharing your journey with us!
Giddy-up! How inspiring!!! You’ve got me gearing up to hit the trails as we speak.
Thanks for sharing. You go, Girl!!!
Thank you for the lovely comments everyone.
Wow, Rhea, quite a shapeshift you’ve undergone yourself. Fabulous!
See you out on the trails, JodyLynn!
Saddle up, move ‘em out!
I am jumping up and down on the inside as I read your words…so inspirational! Congrats on being part of this power posse – you are one cowgirl who knows how to roll!!
xoxo….Penni
I am sorry, but I don’t get it. What about the weeks of feeling hungry and staring down another salad. I wish it was easier, but when I try I just feel like I am starving.
Way to go! I too have dealt with an eating disorder and have found Kris’ upbeat attitude to life one of my go to places for reminding myself what life is really about! Keep up the good work
Cintra, no deprivation and starving here. Those days are looooooooong gone for me.
I eat an abundance of fresh fruit and veggies, sprouts, nuts, seeds…the possibilities are endless, really!
The Raw Food Detox Diet is a great place to start. Natalia lays out menu plans + shares ooddles of delicious recipes.
Another terrific resource for some creative inspiration (and life beyond salads) is Kristan’s Raw.
Thank you!! I am getting back on the raw bandwagon myself as I seem to be having some digestive issues these days. Yesterday I had some green smoothies and already it seems to make a huge difference. I have Natalia’s book – I must re-read it.
How inspirational! My dogs would love a 5K walk morning & night!!! I think I’ll make their dreams come true. Thanks for sharing your story.
EM!!!!!! I love you!!! so glad to read your post and see you here! MOre MORE MORE from Earth Mother, cannot get enough of your great stuff!
xoxoxo love deb
Earth Mother it is such a pleasure to see you here, featured with your story! This is fantastic and I can never get tired of reading your story as it is SO inspirational!
I love your journey and am thrilled that you have turned your life around so much and made your health and vitality such a priority!
To many more healthy and vibrant years
I have hit a weightloss plateau after losing about 40 pounds. This week I have resolved to eat more raw and ordered two raw cookbooks as a inspiration/reward for doing so. I feel so light when I eat veg. I want to drop another 10 to 15 pounds. I’ve got to hit the gym more regularly now that radiation treatment is over. Love health book recommendations.
Great Job.I am Reading Natalia’s ZDetox book now before reading that you read Natalia’s detox book already.It is a great lifestyle,even when we once in a while fall of the path!~Dianne
First of all. Thank you for telling so many of our stories. I too have a Siberian Husky walking partner and nothing on earth can get you walking like the stubborn loving fabulous huskies.. Saatchi could give a rats if it is raining or so hot you know Alabama has been annexed into hell itself.. she and I both love to make tracks. The walking is my church, therapist and workout. Like you we do about five in both morning and evening.. if not we are both loco. When Cancer struck I starved myself not from desire but from sheer nausea in that time I gained 100 pounds doing nothing but taking steriods and chemo and retching. When I ended chemo to go my own route I got healthy.. ate healthy and threw away the scale and some skinny jeans I wish I had back. My behind became the incredible shrinking machine and my hair, skin and body began to work well. I gloried in each Poo… I can remember being jealous of Saatchi just being able to poo.. now we are pooing and doing all things together. I think that although my lifestyle has changed the fundamentals are so ingrained in our dna that when we eat right whether vegan or not we begin to respond. I think with cancer no meat is best but without know where it all comes from and did it have a happy life and a humane death.. no mass market meat or eggs..no hormones.. and voila healthy living. I love kris for what her book has done for my life and love that as we all transition into what we are to become we find our place on this food chain and response latter. As Albus Dumbledore says we are not a sum of our abilities but a sum of our choices… Well I suppose that is really JK Rowling.. but how true. Thanks for this fabulous blog.. and bravo on your choices. Callie Saatchi sends Maya a hello and a brocalli stem and peace treat. Bark..
Wow, great story (got the referral from Raw-Fu). I love hearing wonderful transformations like this. Do you have before and after pix?
What an incredible uplifting story. I need to do what you have done. I have always been interested in raw food and believe my time has come. Thanks for having strength to show us all this can be done. Congratulations to you ! WOW youare to be admired!
Thank you all for sharing your own stories of inspiration, as well as your encouragement and support.
I recognize a few beauties here — Lauren, Penni, Deb, Evita — who have been such wonderful cheerleaders for me along the way. My heartfelt thanks and admiration to you.
Jonathan and your “plateau”: trust that your body did what it needed to while you were undergoing radiation treatments. Be kind and gentle with yourself. You have lots of detoxifying to do now. Slow and steady. Lots of fresh green juices, fruits, veggies. I think it’s wonderful you’re jazzed to start creating in the kitchen and ordered some raw cookbooks. Your body will release the excess weight.
Callie: LOVED your story. Thank you for quoting Albus Dumbledore. Maya sends an “Arrrroooooooooooo” to Saatchi!
Many Blessings to one and all…
xo!
EM
You’re so awesome! Love the post.
Cheers XOXO,
Kristen
Awww! I just read back through the comments and saw your link to me. Thank you so much. Truly.
XOXO,
Kristen
YAY Earthmother! Your story is such an inspiration. YOU are an inspiration and I feel so very happy that you are regaining your health and spirit each day. Bless you for sharing your story.
You are such an inspiration! I love your story… and I tell so many people in my real life about you.
Great story! Thank you for sharing this! My start to raw food was via a Hippocrates Inst. grad and the book “Living Foods for Optimum Health”. Terrible recipes in there, but a great introduction to why one should consider raw and how to get started.
You are SUCH an inspiration! Determination such as yours is a story that can’t be over told. It’s just so POSITIVE! Congratulations to you, Earthmother and my thanks, too, for in sharing your story, you are helping me supercharge my way into some version of veggie-vegan-raw dining.
What a wonderful story-I am so proud of you for your success and healing from an unhealthy lifestyle! You have renewed my spirit
Love you E.M. Giddyup!!
Very inspiring, Earthmother! I’m so happy that you found yourself again!
You sound like an amazing lady, Earthmother — good for you for taking charge of your health! What an incredible journey
love it. thanks for your inspiration.
Thanks so much for this great article. I’m inspired to congratulate myself for moving from a DIEt mentality to a LIFEstyle framework of self-trust. As a creativity coach and author, I feel so fortunate to give up the withholding practices and give in to the “what would feel the most energizing and good to me now (with positive side effects tomorrow)?
Best to you all,
Jennifer
p.s. sign up for my newsletter once a month for creative inspiration to finish writing and publishing your book!