Bye-bye, Comfort Zone
Growing up, my cousin Joanie and I used to spend every summer day at the pool. Joanie was fearless—she’d kick off her flops, throw her towel down and jump in. I, on the other hand, insisted on taking the steps. I’d walk down one step, hang out there a couple of seconds, then step back up out of the pool. Take two steps, and retreat. Three steps, and right back out. It took me 10 freaking minutes to finally dunk my head under that chilly water. I knew it was kinda ridiculous, but plunging in was too much of a shock.
When I read Kris’ posts about how she’s fasting for 21 days, my first thought was “I am so out of my league.” I utterly and devotedly respect Kris and her dedication to all things green and vibrant. Yet my only experience with fasting lasted exactly two days—although I had planned a five-day juice fast, I started eating after only 36 hours when my roommate came home with chips and salsa and beer.
Although I am dedicated to pursuing wellness for myself and helping people on their own journey toward better health and wellbeing, I don’t go nearly as far as many of my fellow blog posse or you readers who post so eloquently. So as I sit down to write this post, there is a part of me that keeps chanting, “holy shit, holy shit, holy shit.” That’s why I’m taking full, deep, conscious breaths and concentrating only on taking one step at a time.
Whether I’m getting in a cold pool or undertaking a major health initiative, my M.O. hasn’t shifted much since those days at the pool—keep nudging your comfort zone until you reach your ultimate destination. It may not suit everyone or be appropriate for every time in your life (sometimes we all need radical change, stat). But I’m writing this post in particular for any readers who aren’t vegan, or who can’t imagine fasting for 21 days, or who are intimidated by the thought of going raw. Whatever your particular health goal is, I’m here to espouse the path of taking it one step at a time. If you’re not ready to go entirely animal-product free, perhaps you can concentrate on substantially upping your veggie intake, leaving less room on your plate—and in your tummy—for meat. Or eat one raw meal a day. Or fast from lunch time to lunch time. It’s so tempting to think our efforts to get healthier are all or nothing. “I ate one potato chip, may as well eat the whole bag.” I’m here to plant the seed that it doesn’t have to be that way.
I recently shifted my comfort zone to give up chocolate. Now, you don’t know me, but trust me when I say that I was addicted. I had to have a couple squares of dark chocolate after every meal. And when I was pregnant last year, it was half a huge bar of dark chocolate after every meal. I ate myself sick on dark chocolate covered almonds (damn you Trader Joe’s and your compulsively tasty treats!) not once but three times. Finally, on that third night, I had a dream where I was talking to a friend who asked me if I wanted dessert, and I replied, “No thanks, I’ve got to give chocolate up for a while because it is just not working for me.” I woke up that next morning and resolved to heed my own advice. Now it’s been two months without a drop. And it hasn’t been that hard, yet (talk to me in another two months). But I am so pleased to report that my new comfort zone does not require chocolate.
My current shift is committing to getting some focused exercise every day. I’ve got a 13-month-old daughter who’s up at six, a limited childcare budget, and a pile of deadlines and work goals (that I am so thankful to have). Consequently, working up a sweat has taken a backseat to getting enough sleep, eating decently, and getting work done. The problem is, this lack of exercise has started to impact my energy level, disrupt my sleep, and shorten my fuse. It’s only been five days, but this past week I’ve been donning the sweats and lunging, planking, squatting and warrior 2-ing my way to a sheen every morning. Sometimes the baby is sticking her finger in my ear as I hold that plank pose, but we’re learning how to work around each other. So far, it’s tougher than giving up chocolate, but I figure I’ll just keep doing it until it becomes my new comfort zone. (I’m already sleeping better, which is pretty damn comfy.) Next up? Re-establishing my meditation practice.
So, how are you shifting your comfort zone? Are you more of a one-step-at-a-time of a dive-right-in type of person?
16 Comments
for chocolate fixes: use raw carob, the good stuff, just as yummy, add some lucuma powder, YUM
for tea: use decaf herb mixes, licorice is naturally sweet and great for bedtime!
I think subbing is the way to go.. or just let go of it if you are able. Takes time to make new habits! 21 days they say..
love deb
I’m definitly a “one-step-at-a-time” kind…because if not, I try to go for the all or nothing and don’t allow myself any room for failure. That just ends up making me feel lower, so the one step approach is becoming my MO. I’m currently trying to let go of CONTROL issues: in my own life, in my marriage, in my kiddos lives, at work….I’m a control freak to the max!! Most days it’s one step forward & 1/2 step (or more) back!! But I’m feeling less like a failure and more like an explorer charting new waters everyday!
Thanks for the awesome post!!
**Keep with the yoga/meditation regardless of that little one =) It’s soooo worth it!
I usually go for baby steps. Right now, I’ve gone vegetarian for Lent and eat mostly vegan and gluten-free on weekdays. It may be slow-going but I can feel my comfort zone expanding!
Very nice post. I’ve been discouraged many times. I’ve been trying to juice. Trying to eat less meat. I get discouraged, then I totally have the “one chip, might as well eat the whole bag” attitude, too! The only thing I’ve been successful at is execise and meditation. Go figure. I like the baby steps attitude. It’s not too much pressure, but it’s enough to know you’re moving toward a goal.
In seminary my favorite teacher told me if you are uncomfortable you ar enot working hard enough to push your boundries. In staying in a constant state of growth your inner self is always having a workout. I belive that. When I find a fear.. I dive in.. cold sweats, wigging out and desire for a xanax quickly set in.. but when the accomplishment hits.. all that weird fear leaves and I am on to the next addrenaline war…I have taught myself that the opposite of live.. spell it backward it evil.. if you aren’t living it is time to push.. life is good and good stress is a needed thing. I loved your blog. Thanks Callie
sorry they said if you are not uncomfortable..
Great post!! Thank you for the kind and wise words. Life is perpetual motion and as long as we are moving in the right direction we will be okay. One thing at a time.
You are an inspiration! I really need to get back to my exercise routine as well. A 30 minute walk makes all the difference… oh that I could swing early morning yoga too! Gah!
I subbed out Kombucha for beer. What a difference! I insist on a green smoothie every morning and I eat raw ’til lunch… but yeah, I love chocolate in the afternoons too..
I bookmarked you! Thanks~!
OH MY! You’re talking to me aren’t you???… T H A N K S so much for your post. I seem to be on the exact same caffiene/exercise plan as you. One step at a time… one day at a time… you are speaking my language!!
Great post. I’m a new mom and managing not only the 10 month old baby (who’s up a LOT at night) but also a full time job, childcare costs, bills, the list goes on. so my goals are to try and get up only a couple times a night with the kid, eat vegan meals that i’ve hopefully cooked myself, enjoy my child when i’m home, and rest when possible. so exercise – HAHA is what i’ve been saying to myself. because i’m very all/nothing about that. well if i can’t exercise 5 days a week, why do it at all?!? Thanks for your post and the encouragement:)
I am very Type A and find that I want to do the “all or nothing” approach diving in head first….but that fizzles and dies. One step at a time is the healthiest and most effective approach at making LONG lasting changes in lifestyle…in my opinion. It doesn’t hurt that my psych training has taught me the same as well.One step at a time…
kate-
sorry i am late to the party but had to say LOVED your post and i understand the holy shits all to well :) i am a jump all the way in before you even know if the pool is full kinda of gal-works for me most of the time but i am discovering that there really is something to the one step thing so thanks for the reminder-you rock!
your blog sista-
crazy sexy life coach
terri
cool caring kate~
well, i am VERY late to the party but so very glad to be here! thank you so much for your blog! i was feeling so inadequate by comparing myself to those who are doing so much better than me in my eyes. i so appreciate your transparency. your blog reminded me to have self compassion and take it one step at a time~
peace, love and ear-poking-babies!
kelly
Great post. I gave up coffee (after 20 years) this past november. It’s been, well, not too bad. As far as the working out goes, I’ve got three little ones, and work on the weekends. My time for working out comes at 0430. Find a gym that close and opens early, and you could be done before DD even thinks about awakening. Make yourself a priority.
i want sexy tips
I think short term, achievable goals are the way to go. I gave up all the common allergens and a bunch of other stuff from my diet about 4 years ago but it didn’t happen overnight. Some things, like tea, took a while to let go of. But once I make a change and feel the rewards, my motivation increases and I don’t look back! Now I am more focused on what to add in than what I need to take out of my life.
March 10, 2009